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Would children not grow up too quickly if we.....

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by ad_1980, Aug 9, 2009.


  1. ad_1980

    ad_1980 PetForums VIP

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    taught them the difference between right from wrong earlier enough? Like smoking, drugs and alcohol for example.

    As you can see i'm picking up from Fleur's thread?

    You see too many 9 + kids wearing make up, having their nails painted, wearing clothes they shouldn't be, wearing heels, talking about boys, smoking etc......would this all stop if we taught our children about all this sooner? or do you think it wouldn't make such a difference?

    God i'm quite debatey today LOL
     
  2. DevilDogz

    DevilDogz Guest

    I have always been brought up to know the right and wrong from an early age..and why its wrong ect.
    I have never been intrested in drugs and have never smoked.:)..Would never have been allowed to leave the house dressed like that at that age either! :p
     
  3. Ducky

    Ducky PetForums VIP

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    i dont think its got anything to do with what age you teach from, its more the way in which you teach them. i mean my parents informed me of all these things from as young as i can remember, but never in a "dont u do this" way as they felt that would just make me want to do these things more. and i totally agree with this. because nothing was ever banned or taboo to me, i never felt the need to do any of it young.
     
  4. thedogsmother

    thedogsmother PetForums VIP

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    I have a 9 and 10 year old who I teach the difference between right and wrong, I think they are quite innocent in the ways of the world (which in my opinion if fine for their age) and I encourage them to play with children who I consider to be nice children. My daughter came home yesterday from a friends house who's mother is a child minder so I thought it was a safe place to play only to tell me that her friend who is only 7 not only described a sexual act but also acted it out for them. I was horrified and needless to say she will not be playing with this girl again but it proves that you can be very careful what your child watches on tv, wears etc and still they can grow up quicker than they should.
     
  5. kitties

    kitties PetForums Senior

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    my kids (8 and 10) are always asking for high heels etc, I dont see the need! why get their gorgeous little legs damaged while they are still growing! They say but such and such has them I dont care! and really nor do they, I say no and they accept it. Some of the clothes for the kids are just horrible as well I like them where possible to look like little girls, its getting harder, no more smocked pretty dresses lol! but they can still look nice without looking like they are going out for a night on the town!!

    When I see older kits smoking etc, I talk to mine, and say how silly the girls are etc etc, and I just hope something is going in, and they wont when they are older. I want to my lock mine up though.
     
  6. Cassies-mum

    Cassies-mum PetForums VIP

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    i paint my nails sometimes and wear makeup but not loads and see nothing wrong with that lol, but ive never had a boyfriend (dont want one thanks) never smoked etc...

    my friends wear loads of make up and i dont like it... they smoke but i have told them not to smoke around me if they feel they must (these are my older friends btw, like 16 yr old friends...)

    I dont think it would make a difference to be honest, most of my smokey friends know its wrong but do it anyway...
     
  7. Dylan & Daisy

    Dylan & Daisy PetForums VIP

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    Children grow up too quickly because so many parents see themselves as their childs friend first and parent second. I wouldnt dream of allowing a daughter of mine to wear make up at the age of 9 :eek:, not just because she's still a child but think of the havoc it'll do to her skin as they are notoriously bad at removing the stuff.

    As for the drinking and smoking, well to me it's the age old problem of boredom. There dont seem to be youth clubs about anymore, nothing to keep them occupied, off the streets and doing the things that children should be doing for fun these days.

    You no longer see girls pushing prams with their favourite doll in it, or skipping, playing hop scotch etc and boys playing with their go-karts, cars etc. It's all hi-tech and game consoles!!

    No im not a mother but i know i'd want my children (could i have had them) to be doing child like things and not worrying about being mini adults. There's time enough for them to grow up, mature and take on the responsibilities of adulthood, without starting when they're babies.

    Its a sad world :(
     
  8. kayz

    kayz PetForums VIP

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    I think my parents were quite strict when I think about it. But in a good way. I don't think I actually started wearing make up until I was about 15. I have smoked, I was 17 and gave up at 19 when we decided to have a baby.

    I do think a lot of it is peer pressure from friends though.
     
  9. Fleur

    Fleur Vassal to Lilly and Ludo

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    I actually think kids are less mature these days - but have more available to them.
    My Mum left home at 15 to continue her education and then start her nurses training.
    I had a job waitressing at 14 - 4 shifts every weekend so I could buy the clothes etc I wanted.
    Where as my kids are unable to get jobs under 16.
    They have access to the internet, mobile phones more disposable income etc.

    I've tried to answer all my kids questions no matter the subject, give them the confidence to make their own choices.

    My 13 year old which started this debate is allowed to wear a little mascara and lipgloss, fashionable - but not tarty clothes - and have a shandy at a family bbq.
    There is a balance in all things in life
     
  10. Cassies-mum

    Cassies-mum PetForums VIP

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    i have been offered a job that im taking and im only 13 :confused:
     
  11. ad_1980

    ad_1980 PetForums VIP

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    My mum is quite strict and yes you are right in what you say about parents being parents first, best friend later, although my mum has never played the 'best' friend role with me...sometimes i wish she would but she never has. But yes going back to strict mother, i wasn't allowed to have boys at parties, i wasn't allowed to wear make up or nail varnish until i was 16.

    Smoking and drugs i learnt for myself. the smoking part, i only learnt at 6 from the death of my grandfather who died of lung cancer. Alcohol....i wasn't bothered about it at all really.
     
  12. Kinjilabs

    Kinjilabs PetForums VIP

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    I was bought up in an era when kids were kids, smoking drinking makeup etc were unheard of, gawd if we had done any of those things we would be belted! and I grew up to be a responsible person so it didnt harm me :)
     
  13. Cassies-mum

    Cassies-mum PetForums VIP

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    im allowed boys at parties but not sleepovers... they can come for the day bit but have to go home at 8

    im only allowed them because some of my BEST friends are boys :D
     
  14. Chillinator

    Chillinator Guest

    Turn to pages 20-21 of yesterday's Daily mail...

    Quite shocking to be honest. :eek:
     
  15. kayz

    kayz PetForums VIP

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    99% of my friends are male. I used to get so bored at sleepovers, all that talking about make up and shoes. I'd always much rather be off climbing trees, playing footie and riding my bike. I have always thought that a boys sleepover would be much more fun.

    Though I have been converted to a bit of a shoe freak!!
     
  16. Cassies-mum

    Cassies-mum PetForums VIP

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    tell us more D: i dont have daily mail :(
     
  17. Chillinator

    Chillinator Guest

    It's an article on a spoilt-rotten 11 year old whose parent's have blown £150,000 on during that time. Allegedly she was wearing 'Gucci' (I'm a guy, so I've no idea what these are) loafers before she could even walk, has a credit card which is topped up with £400 on a monthly basis and has around £2000 worth of electronic gear in the form of laptops and an Apple i-phone. Don't quote me on the rest of it as you could literally blow a blood-vessel.

    The world's gone mad... :shocked:
     
  18. ad_1980

    ad_1980 PetForums VIP

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    See? If more children were taught things correctly by their parents they wouldn't lose their innocence so quickly.

    I wonder if tv and advertising are to blame as well..........

    what's in the daily mail?
     
  19. Cassies-mum

    Cassies-mum PetForums VIP

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    that is mad... - im kinda spoilt by my dad, but not that much :eek:
     
  20. Chillinator

    Chillinator Guest

    Read above...

    The media is partly to blame for this however the parents also share some of the responsibility.
     
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