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Where should she live?

Discussion in 'Dog Training and Behaviour' started by Deleted member 1453303, Nov 15, 2020.


  1. Hi guys, I haven’t been here in a long time but I need some advice and you all give the best help.

    Basically I have a cockapoo called Star who is nearly four. Due to certain circumstances she has always lived with me and my mum. We also both worked from home so she has severe separation anxiety. So much so that if one of us goes outside or gets out of the car she cries.

    So on Friday I moved into a small flat very near the house my mum still lives in. We decided it was best for Star to stay there as she’s known it so long and there’s a garden and more room. While I will still spend time with Star and walk her through the day.

    Tonight my mum text me to say that Star is going room to room and waiting at the door for me. It’s breaking my heart. I often project my feelings onto Star which is why she is so anxious I’m sure.

    So what should I do?. Leave her to get used to the change?. Should I move her with me though she would have no garden or anything. Or should we go back and forth?. My mum suggested swapping every other night but I thought Star would get too confused.

    please mend my heart!
     
  2. tabelmabel

    tabelmabel Banned

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    Omg how spooky is this - you have really been on my mind lately and i was wondering how you were and here you are!

    This is a no brainer - move star to your new place asap. Dogs don't care about big gardens and houses - they need their favourite people.

    Star will be much happier with you:)

    Nice to hear from you and know star and you are ok. Or will be once you are together!
     
  3. Lurcherlad

    Lurcherlad PetForums VIP

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    Well, I know Jack would prefer to be with me, wherever that is.

    Obviously, you’ll just have to compensate for there being no garden but even that wouldn’t be an issue for Jack as he doesn’t need to go out many times a day. (A pain for me though not being able to just open the back door in my pj’s ;).)

    I’d try her with you and see how she settles. I assume you’re still going to be around most of the time?

    I would also look to work on her SA.
     
    tabelmabel likes this.
  4. I guess I expected that she was just as attached to my mum as much as me. I’ll have her at my place tonight and see how it goes. I have a little balcony so if I could get her to have a wee on there during the night that would be good. If not I can take her out. It’s just not the safest area but if she wants to be with me then she will.



    I’ve tried with her SA but as soon as one of us leaves she cries so hard to build up. At the moment my brother comes once a week for a few hours so she is ok with him. Once the lockdown restrictions are eased I’ll look into a behaviourist.
     
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  5. LinznMilly

    LinznMilly Moderator
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    Welcome back. :D

    In the meantime, have a look at this
    The Canine Consultants - SA .

    Half way down, there's a game called The Flitting Game that you might find useful. :)
     
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  6. Lurcherlad

    Lurcherlad PetForums VIP

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    Having the balcony will help you - maybe look at a large shallow tray (builders use them) with some turf in to ease her transition?
     
    LinznMilly likes this.
  7. That’s a great post thanks, so many times people say “give her a filled Kong” etc but she couldn’t care less. I could give her a steak in those situations and she wouldn’t touch it.
     
    LinznMilly likes this.
  8. I’ll have a look into it thanks.
     
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  9. Teddy-dog

    Teddy-dog PetForums VIP

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    Hi! Lovely to see you back. I agree that I’d try her at your place and see how you goes.

    If I remember right, you’re from near-ish me? If you’re looking for a trainer/behaviourist then I can recommend Tamsin At Dedicated to dogs (I think she should cover round you). She’s worked with the very nervous greyhound I walk and he’s come on really well.
     
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  10. Heya thanks I’ll look into Tamsin. Star is currently at mine and is doing better. The main problem is that she’s asking to go downstairs to the outside grass constantly but then messes about because it’s all so new and interesting. It wouldn’t normally be an issue but my neighbours are always in their garden so I look a right tit trying to get Star to pee while she ignores me.
     
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  11. Torin.

    Torin. PetForums VIP

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    I'd do the thing where you teach a cue for going to the loo (you'll need to teach it separately for both peeing and pooing). Once it's properly taught just hearing the word/ phrase can be enough to make them feel they need to go. Cad's phrase is "d'you need the loo?" and if he gets distracted by sniffs when I first let him out all I need to do is say that a couple of times and he's like "oh yes! I urgently need to do that now!"

    Unfortunately it's not an immediate fix and you'll need to look like slightly more of a tit for a while!
     
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  12. Yes normally she will sit and stare at me or tap me and I will say “do you need a pee pee?” But she’s doing a it constantly. I think she does actually need to go but she messes about and I get frustrated and bring her back inside. There’s loads of distractions, cats, a dog next door, people walking past etc.
     
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