So sorry for the title but the reason i ask is because i feel so guilty and i'm torn as what to do My Barney passed 5 weeks ago,we got him cremated and the day he went i was adamant that we would take him down to the meadow where we used to walk at the bottom of our street and let him run free. Over a month has passed and Barney is still in his scatter tube in the box we collected him in on the windowsill in the living room.......I just can't bring myself to release him and let him go. I feel so selfish as i know how much he loved been in the meadows but every time hubby says how "its such a lovely day...why don't we take our Barnster" I just snap at him that i can't do it. I don't want to put Barney in the garden as we have no grass....just decking and paving slabs so he has nowhere to settle.I have bought a potted plant dedicated to him but if he goes in with the soil and the plant dies then i will be heartbroken. I maybe would like to buy a urn for him but feel so bad for keeping Barney in the house when i know deep down that he'd want to be out and about,running around like the excited doggy he was when he was full of health......I just wish that i wasn't mindset on letting him go at the beginning as now i feel so guilty and upset that i can't. I'm normally quite a rational person but for the last couple of weeks i have been in utter turmoil as to what to do.....do i carry on been selfish,transfer Barney to a urn and keep him in the house or do what i think is best for Barney and let him run free. I though as each day passed i would find it easier as to what to do but it doesn't. Thanks for reading.