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When enough is enough .

Discussion in 'Cat Health and Nutrition' started by louise birks, Aug 15, 2019 at 10:31 PM.


  1. louise birks

    louise birks PetForums Junior

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    My Pebbles is 15 years old. She has lost a bit of weight and has been fussing with her food. I put it down to being fussy but she had 2 days while I was away at mums not eating. Hubby said he was really worried so I came home early and got her in at the vets. They said she was jaundiced. Vets hadn't said anything at her health check a couple of months ago. She had a blood test, which showed high liver enzymes so then they said she needed an ultrasound. The ultrasound showed some discoloured area of liver and enlarged gall bladder. So vet suggested that she needed a biopsy at Vet hospital. I agreed. I took her on Tuesday . She was there all day. I waited in the local area as it is a bit of a distance from home. The vet said that he had taken samples of sorts of things and would be a few days before results.
    She has been starved 3 times for these visits, shaved paws, neck, belly. She was all stressed after the anesthesia. She is eating loads now, loving her food. Is happy and chirpy.
    The vet phoned me today with the results. He wanted to do a CT scan, operate and take liver, abdominal samples, and remove possible benign or malignant cysts. He couldn't guarantee that this would solve things or even give all the answers.
    I said NO. I have been so upset and sick worrying every time they took her in for tests and the phone calls. She is 15. I feel that I want to do what I can for her but I can't bear her being prodded at anymore. She is cuddling with me now. I don't really need people opinion because I have done soul searching and I can't bear it anymore. Thanks for reading.
     
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  2. chillminx

    chillminx PetForums VIP

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    Hi Louise, I understand exactly what you mean. Sometimes medical 'heroics' are not appropriate in an older cat and it is kinder to keep them comfortable, give lots of TLC and then let them go with compassion and dignity, when the time feels right.

    Thinking of you and dear Pebbles with sympathy. x
     
  3. buffie

    buffie Mentored by Meeko

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    I can only agree with @chillminx sometimes " just because we can " doesn't mean we should.
    Quality of life is often more important than quantity.................xx
     
    #3 buffie, Aug 15, 2019 at 11:23 PM
    Last edited: Aug 15, 2019 at 11:29 PM
  4. lorilu

    lorilu PetForums VIP

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    I completely support your decisions for your beloved Pebbles. xxxx
     
  5. louise birks

    louise birks PetForums Junior

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    Thank you for your kind comments. It's really hard. Humans can make choices over what treatments they consent to, animals can't and rely on their owners to make the choice. I am sad but partly relieved that I know really that money isn't going to solve things. I have maxed out my insurance and having been paying out of my own account so not to make my husband feel the pressure. If I thought that paying for something would solve it I wouldn't hesitate. She had the radioactive iodine treatment for thyroid and it was the best decision I made. But this is different.
     
  6. ChaosCat

    ChaosCat PetForums VIP

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    Multiple vet visits with unsure results are not contributing to her quality of life, fully understand your thinking.
    It is a hard decision, always full of doubts, but it is a decision of love.
     
  7. Babyshoes

    Babyshoes PetForums Senior

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    I totally agree. If a firm diagnosis isn't going to significantly change the treatment, then why bother? Especially as there is not even a guarantee that these tests will provide a diagnosis.
     
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  8. SbanR

    SbanR PetForums VIP

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    I'm sorry you're going through this difficult time. Thinking of you and Pebbles and sending lots to support
     
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  9. MilleD

    MilleD PetForums VIP

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    Hi Louise,

    I'm going through exactly the same as you with an older cat. The vet has absolutely tried his best to get to the bottom of what is wrong and provide some relief.

    I've also decided that enough is enough, and to let her go. At home rather than yet another stressful trip to the vets.

    It's sad, but if they are suffering, it's the last kindness we can offer.

    Hugs to you x
     
  10. Soozi

    Soozi PetForums VIP

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    I so agree with you the quality of her life is what's important not the quantity. I do not believe in not leaving them to suffer a minute longer than they need to. I lost my last girl from leukemia but she actually died of cardiac arrest I know in my heart she was just too stressed to take anymore. I am so sorry you have had to make the decision but I believe it's the right call. Thinking of you in your sadness. XXX
     
  11. Bertie'sMum

    Bertie'sMum Obedient Cat Slave

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    "Better a day too early than a day too late" has always been my mantra when having to make this difficult decision - you know in your heart what has to be done but it is so hard to let them go.
     
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  12. louise birks

    louise birks PetForums Junior

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    Thank you again and hugs to you for having similar heartbreaking decisions to make.
    Sometimes you have to know the limits on life and I am going to cherish all her happiness and help her thro her more difficult times to come. I wish I had had this chance with my late brother who passed unexpectedly when he was only 30. We spend a lot of time rushing around and taking everything for granted.
    She has been so cuddly with the family today even my son who is a bit lively.
     
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  13. Soozi

    Soozi PetForums VIP

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    Thinking of you at this very sad time. I think most on here have had to make the same decision, the hardest you ever have to make but it shows how much love you have for your lovely girl and know that it’s time. God bless xxx
     
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  14. Sacremist

    Sacremist Mum to 2 cats and a dog

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    At 15 I think you’ve made the right decision.
     
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  15. Raluca Matei

    Raluca Matei PetForums Newbie

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    Let me also share a story with you. My first cat ever Kitty, a stray, like all my other 4 cats got breast cancer in 2015. I was devastated, I cannot tell you how much that cat meant to me. She was family, she was almost human, she was the most amazing cat I had ever seen. She loved us as well like you don't see in cats that often. I suspected it was cancer from the first time I saw that little bump near her nipple. I took her to the vet and because she had suffered a stroke a few months before, she was kind of reluctant to operate. She said that maybe it was not cancer, let's try some ointments, let's wait it out... well a lot of rubbish. I waited for a month or so (I still blame myself for that) and after that my vet did surgery and of course it was carcinoma and a very aggressive one. What happened after was a lot of chemo, another surgery and then a lot of chemo and one year and a half later she died anyway, it metastasized to her lungs. Not to mention that even then I tried a final session of chemo. I couldn't accept her dying and I ignored, in my selfishness what I was putting her through: all the nausea, the loss of appetite, the distress, the stress she was accumulating with every visit to the vet. And all that for almost two more years, out of which only 4 or 5 months were indeed ok. Plus she was taking a lot of natural remedies, like mushrooms which were also making her sick. I would never do that again. I only did it because I wanted so much for her to live. She was 13 when she died, I thought it was the end of the world for me, me and hubby spent days crying almost all the time, but I had to let her go, we had to put her down because the cancer had affected her breathing severely. She was extremely thin, couldn't even walk, well, I don't even want to remember that week.
    What I want to say is that we tend to not think of them when we put them through difficult procedures and treatments and we forget that many of them are not even verified of efficient for animals. Many of them are just tests or a way to postpone the inevitable. We just have to let them go while they are feeling ok. Maybe surgery, yes I would probably do it again if it was not very invasive, risk-free and would guarantee some results. But that's it.
     
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  16. Ottery

    Ottery Cat Lady

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    I think I would have made the same decision as you.
    There is a time for treatment and tests, and a time when you just want your cat back home with you.

    I have always worked on the same premise as Bertie's mum - better a day too early than a day too late.

    When one of my cats had kidney failure, his blood tests looked pretty bad yet my cat was still fine, so the vet couldn't gauge how long he had left. The vet said to me "he'll tell you when it's time". And he did.
     
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  17. louise birks

    louise birks PetForums Junior

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    It must have been heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing your story. I have been feeling guilty for not really noticing or acting on her weight loss. Even if I had taken her to the vets a month or 2 months ago the outcome is probably the same. I suppose I was complacent when her annual health check in march was ok. In 4 months has she really got that poorly. She has been bobbing around today like yesterday and is behaving like normal. I am just enjoying her cheeky attitude, because she is a 'naughty tortie'. I love her personality x
     
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  18. Raluca Matei

    Raluca Matei PetForums Newbie

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    From my experience, their health usually degrades very quickly. We had 2 dogs that died of melanoma and from the moment we discovered their condition until they died, we had just 2 or 3 months left with them. I know that blame is human nature and when it comes to our beloved cats or dogs we feel guilty for not noticing or considering warning signs but you don't always see it. I am a real hypocondriac when it comes to me and the close ones so I have to.admit that I may take my cats too often to the vet and in most cases there is nothing wrong with them, but better safe than sorry. Cherish the time you have left with her, make her happy and feel safe. If your vet told you there is nothing you can do, if you would put her through torture and misery with the surgery and the outcome will probably be the same in a few months... I don't see why you would do it. I would do it provided she had a really good chance to a quality life. Take it from someone who has been this road 3 times, it's hell for everybody.
     
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  19. Raluca Matei

    Raluca Matei PetForums Newbie

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    Oh and still keeping my fingers crossed. Miracles can happen. I heard of them. Maybe diet or some natural remedies could help and prolongue her life. The most important thing is for her not to suffer.
     
    louise birks likes this.
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