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Discussion in 'Cat Chat' started by Kathleen Paterson, May 23, 2017.


  1. Kathleen Paterson

    Kathleen Paterson PetForums Newbie

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    I had a very young unnuetered male cat turn up in my garden 2 weeks ago. As I have my door open a lot he would come in starving for food. I discouraged him at first. But then he'd be at my patio doors scraping to come in, evidently frightened. So as a massive cat lover I did let him in. He is very young as is not used to being out all night I guess. I fed him and he ate like mad. I put up a notice where I live, rang around all local vets, registered his details on-line and put a post of Facebook to see if anyone knew who this poor little man belonged to. No response. Long story short. He has been living with me for a week and a half, is in a routine and he is a very happy and very loved boy. I had him booked in for t.m morn at Vets to be neutered as knew it was a matter of time before he started looking for females. Last night he didn't come home. I was worried sick. I stayed up till 2am waiting ( very ill with a chest infection) and in the end I went to bed but left window open a little so I would hear the bell on his collar. I shot out of bed at 5.30am. Still no sign. First time in the week and a half he has lived with me that he hasn't come home. So as u can imagine I was in tears, worried sick and close to the edge. He turned up at 8.30am but I could sense he wasn't right. Very nervous and edgy. Then I noticed he had a different collar on ! Way too big and not a quick release one. After 2 hrs he finally managed to settle but prior to that he was constantly getting up and down off my bed as if he were afraid somebody was going to come in and get him. Since then he's been flat out in my bed for the most part. Other than filling his tum and going outside in garden for a few minutes. He is sound asleep on my bed now. Anyway, because somebody had taken his perfectly good and safe collar off and put a totally unsuitable one on I guessed it was somebody's way of saying 'He is my cat !' So because of that, and as poorly as I am, I had wrote 8 small notes and walked the entire close I live in, knocked on doors, spoke to people and posted the notes from those who weren't in. No-one really had a clue tho those I spoke to were really kind and gave me advice about what to do. I needed to know urgently who he belonged to as he was due to go in to the Vets for his neutering in the morning. I then get a call from a young woman who said the cat belonged to her. The description was the same. I explained it all to her, everything I have written here and although she listened she didn't seem to care where I was coming from or how I was feeling. She said that although she has a dog the cat was the first proper pet she has got for herself. I said he was in a routine here, very happy, lots of love and attention and I had fallen in love with him and vice versa. But again she said she wanted to keep him. I explained that he needed to be neutered asap as he would start wandering otherwise and said some Vets were doing it for £5. She didn't know and only said they were thinking about getting him done soon ??!!! I was very emotional towards the end of the call but said I respected the fact he was her cat and that although I wouldn't encourage him, I was NOT going to ignore his cries to come in late at night. After the call I rang my mum as I was an emotional wreck. I am still grieving over the loss of my 15yr old cat Saffy who I had to have put to sleep 6weeks ago and here I was grieving again at the loss of losing Mikesch as I had named him. I had no intention of getting a cat again for some time as losing Saffy crippled me but then this little guy came out of nowhere and adopted me ! After I stopped sobbing and eventually calmed down I decided to talk to his 'owner' again and discuss the facts that if he were happy at home then why is he living with me ? I said all of this tactfully of course. And maybe he wasn't as comfortable with the dog being there as she thinks. Why didn't t she put up posters, knock on doors the first night he went missing or in the week and a half since then ? She assumed he was out on the prowl ! And I asked if the cat was able to come and go but she said although they didn't have a cat flap they sometimes left the window open but because their outside light doesn't work he probably didn't bother to check ?!! She also stated that she is moving soon. This is where u guys come in. I made my mind up to cancel his Op in the morn but I have booked him into the Vets t.m afternoon to be micro chipped if he's not already. Which is highly unlikely. But then I am still unsure whether what I am doing is right. I donot want a battle on my hands where he is legally mine but then she decides to lock him in if she sees him, then I call the Police to get him back, so on and so forth. It wld be trauma for him and for me. And what if she decided, if she saw him, the day she moves, to grab him and take him with her. I wouldn't be able to cope with that. I would go under. Please, please, any and all advice welcome. I know I have rambled on but I am on heavy meds, am poorly and my nerves are shredded ! Big Thank you in advance. X
     
  2. chillminx

    chillminx PetForums VIP

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    Hi @Kathleen Paterson and welcome. :)

    Bless you, I am certain you could provide a better more caring home for this little fellow you have taken in, than his so-called owner is doing. But I am afraid the law is not on your side. He does belong to the current owner (unless she has officially signed him over to you) and if she were to accuse you of stealing him (e.g. by luring him away or shutting him into your house) then you could be charged with theft (as cats are regarded in law as property).

    Your best bet really is to go and talk to her (when you feel a bit stronger physically) and see if you can charm her into letting you keep him. If you can't do that then as a way of helping the little guy you could befriend the young owner and arrange, with the owner's consent, for the kitten to be neutered urgently (with vouchers from Cats Protection) and then try to educate her as to the best way to care for him.

    It may not be what you would really like, but you would be helping the kitten. Which in the end is what counts, as I am sure you will agree.

    Best wishes to you. x
     
    #2 chillminx, May 23, 2017
    Last edited: May 23, 2017
  3. Brambles the cat

    Brambles the cat PetForums Senior

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    i understand where your coming from because the two cats ive had have been owned some point in there life .i never found out where im lucky i supposein that way . one was put to sleep she had a good life though.:( and ive still got brambles on bed at moment snoring .thats the one in the picture. You say you have him booked in at the vet's has this women said you can have him then ? You say he's legally yours but i thought this woman owned him .unless ive read it wrong .
     
  4. Brambles the cat

    Brambles the cat PetForums Senior

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    Forgot to say perhaps another word with the owner may help .its so awful that the cat wants to be with you .and its ovious you care more for the cat .perhaps the cat doesn't get on with the dog aswell .i hope he does get to stay with you .good luck
     
  5. Smuge

    Smuge PetForums VIP

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    He isnt your cat so I am not sure how he could be legally yours?

    I have a lot of sympathy for your post and it sounds like you could provide a better home for him, but he is not in any way your cat. I think it would be very inapproiate to take him to the vet for a procedure.

    You clearly mean well and I dont want to be mean... but technically it kind of sounds like you are trying to steal a cat and the law would not be on your side at all
     
    #5 Smuge, May 23, 2017
    Last edited: May 23, 2017
    Gallifreyangirl and moggie14 like this.
  6. ewelsh

    ewelsh PetForums VIP

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    Hello and welcome

    Firstly welcome to the forum :)

    I am so sorry you lost your beloved cat Saffy, only time will heal your heart, in time you will remember the wonderful years you both had together, my heart goes out to you x

    As for your new visitor, it's a shame the owner doesn't want to give the cat up or agree to have him neutered. I don't think you have much choice but to keep doing what your doing by allowing him in to your home for peace & quiet plus calmness which he is obviously seeking.

    I don't think I would take him to the vets to be microchip especially as you now know the cat has an owner! The law is not on your side I'm afraid.

    If the neighbour moves she may take him or may leave him.

    I hope for you and the little boy she leaves him for you as you obviously love him.

    Sadly some cat owners have different ideas and ways of keeping a pet, which is very difficult to understand.

    The only thing I would say is to ask the owner to change his collar to quick release for obvious reasons & try tactfully to educate her on neutering.

    Stay with us and keep talking, getting stressed on your own will not help your health recover.
     
    Forester likes this.
  7. chillminx

    chillminx PetForums VIP

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    @kathleen Patterson - just to add that 2 weeks is not a long time for a cat to be missing from his home in the grand scheme of things. If the little guy had been living with you for say 4 months, was not microchipped, you would have a better case for claiming him as yours, particularly if you had made every reasonable effort to trace the owner, by advertising him, leafletting and putting up posters (as you did).
     
  8. moggie14

    moggie14 PetForums VIP

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    Agree with this. You cannot get a cat microchipped in your name when it is clearly owned by someone else. You are on dodgy ground here, the cat is not neglected. May i gently and kindly suggest if you would like another cat then choose your own from a shelter or breeder x
     
  9. Charity

    Charity Endangered Species

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    I'm sorry you're in the situation, particularly after losing Saffy not long ago. This is very difficult. In black and white, if you keep him and microchip him knowing he has an owner, that is legally stealing and she could contact the police which you certainly don't want as it would add to your stress. The owner certainly doesn't sound responsible sadly but, at the end of the day, the cat is hers. You could try and persuade her by saying if he's with you, you will have him neutered and microchipped which would save her money but this may not work. If you keep him indoors, her first thought will be that you have kidnapped him which could also result in problems. Really all you can do is try talking to her again or back away. Sorry, I know this isn't what you want to hear.
     
  10. cows573

    cows573 PetForums Senior

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    While I completely sympathise in the loss of your loved one and your love for this one...

    Just because an owner lets their cat outside or doesn't neuter them, doesn't necessarily make them a bad owner. That may be their choice or they may be ill-informed or uneducated regarding cats.

    You cannot take a cat, chip them or neuter them if they are not yours. Try to think how devastated you would have been if your cat had disappeared....and how mad you would have been if someone else had deliberately taken them!
     
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  11. Smuge

    Smuge PetForums VIP

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    Tali isnt microchiped, it will be done when she is spayed. If I let her out and someone chipped her in their name? I can Assure you that I would be seeing them in court

    The cats owner has made it clear that she does not want to give up the cat, I think that the OP's heart is in the right place but I would advise extreme caution before taking any further action as in legal terms this is an open and shut case - in favour of the cats owner

    This would all be 100% different if the cat was a stray or unwanted, but the catwears a collar and the owner has been in contact and has stated that she wants to keep the cat

    And talk of calling the police on the cats legal owner probably breaks several different laws and at the very least would be a waste of police time
     
    #11 Smuge, May 23, 2017
    Last edited: May 23, 2017
  12. bluecordelia

    bluecordelia Footy

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    Welcome to the forum.
    I understand your concerns and worries. I would also suggest you do not microchip the cat.
    You have obviously found that this boy has taken hold on you.
    I would befriend this lady and coax her into getting him neutered etc. If he wants he will vote with his paws and stay with you. She will probably move but you need to play the long game here. Suggest that now he is of an age to spray and be a bit stinky should "you" get him done. If you make too many demands and direct statements you will get his owner slamming the door in your face if you get my drift.

    Get well soon
     
  13. Gallifreyangirl

    Gallifreyangirl PetForums VIP

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    Sorry to hear this and the cat obliviously has voted with his feet. I can only agree with the above that if he has an owner already then you can't get him micro chipped to you, all you can do is try and educate the owner.
     
  14. Erenya

    Erenya PetForums VIP

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    I totally agree with what everyone else has said, unfortunately the law is on the side of this young lady - the cat is property and she owns him. I would suggest one final phone call or letter where you offer to purchase the cat from her as you have fallen in love with him. If she declines, then as hard as it may sound you need to shut your doors and windows and not let this cat back into your house or your life - if you continue to develop the relationship it's only going to be harder.

    Perhaps you are more ready for a cat companion than you thought. If it doesn't work out with Mikesch - and it may not - there are many other cats desperate for a home and maybe the time will come when you feel you're ready to bring one of them into your life.
     
    AmsMam, FeelTheBern and moggie14 like this.
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