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update on my mum :)

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by coral., Jan 12, 2012.


  1. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Hey guys, i dont know wherever you can remember a few months back this thread about my mum -http://www.petforums.co.uk/general-chat/196365-im-going-through-such-tough-time.html

    anyway i thought i would update you and thats i have my mum here now :)
    shes been here 3 weeks this friday, she turned up at a friends flat, cause Dennis had chucked her out me and my boyfriend went straight round there and was talking to her and we offered her to live with us, shes extremely under weight shes about a size 6/8, shes told me very personal things about what Dennis has done to her, shes suffered 2 heart attacks, and took over doses, the places we have been to have said shes very high risk cause shes suicidal and very depressed

    ive been to all different appointments with her, this mental health place where shes had assessments done, and shes had appointments with a domestic violence women, where she has talked about her situation,

    she has got the money for the house thankgod, even though he has spent alot of what she had before, she says she feels sorry for him, but like everyones told her hes playing mind games with her, she has so much of her stuff at his house, me and the boyfriend went a week ago, to get some of her stuff, police didnt allow her to go though just incase she fell for him again, but he didnt answer the door.

    But this monday i rang again, and had to ring dennis and arrange it with him, so police met up with us, and we managed to get quite a few of her things, after a ton of abuse of him! she managed to get basics like clothes and towls, im so happy though cause i managed to get our cat Spice (the tabby one in my avatar) shes 17 this year!
    (gonna post about her in the cat section)
    was so happy though, cause i kept saying to Dennis we want the cat and he was like f*ck off shes my cat now!
    but we went into his garden to get some of mums things out his garage he was pretty drunk and i started calling Spice and she started miawing and was on the fence so i got her and put her in the carrier case, Dennis turned the water works on and was like spice im going to miss you so much - i just walked away with the police!
    Spice has been negleted and shes quite under weight (will post in cat section)

    But for now im getting Spice back on her feet, looking after my mum, going to appointments with her to get herself sorted, and making sure she stays away from him, he knows our address hes sent her a love note saying he loves her so much hes going to peices i kept reminding my mum not to fall for it, he only cares about her bank balance not her!
    hes just a complete peice of scum!

    We are thinking about moving cause he knows our address he thinks shes lives with us, but we told Dennis the other day that shes living in a homeless shelter, also we are only living in a 2 bedroom flat, and her things are from her old house, and what she moved into his house, so we just dont have the room.

    anyway im trying to the best i can for my mum and Spice :)
    im so glad there here though, after 2 years of going through complete sh1t i finally feel things are beginning to look up!
     
  2. xxwelshcrazyxx

    xxwelshcrazyxx PetForums VIP

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    So nice to hear she is okay now and getting help, it is such a worry when you see a person you love going through this. Good job your there for her :D
     
    #2 xxwelshcrazyxx, Jan 12, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 23, 2012
  3. haeveymolly

    haeveymolly PetForums VIP

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    Sounds very positive, your mum has a long way to go but with you there for her she will make it ime sure, just keep that idiot well away.
     
  4. Pointermum

    Pointermum PetForums VIP

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    So glad she's out of that situation now, i hope she can move on with her life soon. Well done you also it must of been hard on you also.
     
  5. blackdiamond

    blackdiamond PetForums Senior

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    Sounds like your mum has been through torture !!!

    Well done your mum with walking away from it, it's probably saved her life in doing so.

    Also a well done to you too for being there for your mum as it will be hard for you too.

    I hope Spice improves now that she has the love around her again.

    XxX
     
  6. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Thanks everyone for the nice comments :)

    she is doing okay, my main thing is, is obviously keeping her away from him and having no contact which so far so good, she hasnt.

    i am beginning to struggle, but i hope things will get easier!
    im going to her appointments, she has one tomorrow at a Orchard resource centre for mental health, and then one on thursday at social services
    hope things will get better :)
    and Spice is very happy here, always warm and shes constantly purring and her favourite time of the day is food time :)
     
  7. MCWillow

    MCWillow PetForums VIP

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    Coral I am so glad things are going in the right direction :)

    If he contacts you, or your mum, again, refer him to Repsect.

    Respect Phoneline- helpline for domestic violence perpetrators

    Confidential information and advice to help perpetrators stop their violence and change their abusive behaviours; information for domestic violence perpetrator programmes.

    Open: Monday - Friday 10am-1pm and 2pm-5pm

    Call 0808 802 4040 (free from landlines and most mobiles)

    I am sure he wont want to know, because a lot of perpertrators are in denial - but he will know you know what he is.
     
  8. katie200

    katie200 PetForums VIP

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    awwww glad things are inproving :)
     
  9. rona

    rona Still missing my boys

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    So glad your mum is improving.
    You must look after yourself also. Take as much help that is on offer.
    Good luck with everything
     
  10. Fleur

    Fleur Vassal to Lilly and Ludo

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    Really good news that your mum was able to get away.
    You must look after yourself as well and like Rona said accept every offer of help no matter how small you're going to need all the support you can get.
    I doubt it's going to be a smooth ride but you will get there.
     
  11. ginge2804

    ginge2804 PetForums VIP

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    So glad things are improving :)
     
  12. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Thanks guys for all the lovely comments :)

    im having good days, and bad days, some days i feel like im struggling cause i feel like im under alot of pressure, but im getting there, and ill update you guys on what happends :) x
     
  13. Fleur

    Fleur Vassal to Lilly and Ludo

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    I've been wondering how you are getting on :)

    Sounds like you're getting there - remember take help when it's offered and when it's not ask for it.
    Your mum is lucky to have you.
     
  14. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Thanks and yes i will do :)
    just some days are hard, cause shes stressed out and panicks cause she wants her things back some days she will shout at me, and blame for whats going on, and sometimes i dont think she realises what shes doing :/

    But on Wednesday shes got a meeting where im going with her, where her social workers going to be there, a police officer, a women from domestic violence, a housing officer from the council, and a women from mental health.

    so ill have to see how that goes :)
     
  15. Fleur

    Fleur Vassal to Lilly and Ludo

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    Just remember she's lashing out and blaming you because you are there - she doesn't really mean it, I'm positive that deep down she knows you are doing what's best for her.

    Really good to hear that you have a meeting lined up with people who can help - please let us know how it goes on Wednesday - fingers crossed for a positive outcome :)
     
  16. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Yeah thats what i try and remember to get me through :)

    And thankyou, hopefully it will go well, and a positive outcome- i will let you know :)
     
  17. rona

    rona Still missing my boys

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    I do hope Wednesday goes well for you both and you are offered some useful help
     
  18. ginge2804

    ginge2804 PetForums VIP

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    hope wednesday goes well :) xx
     
  19. smudgiesmummy

    smudgiesmummy PetForums VIP

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    thats great news ... keep the positive out look a head x
     
  20. coral.

    coral. PetForums VIP

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    Thanks guys for all your help and surport - it means alot! :)
    and i hope wednesday goes well.
     
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