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Thinking of getting a puppy ... help

2K views 29 replies 11 participants last post by  Deleted member 1507993 
#1 ·
Hi, ok so I have a 17 month old and we are moving soon into our own house just the two of us I’ve decided on getting a dog one for him and then company for me too. I used to have beagles I absolutely adore them but our new house has a small ish garden and it’s fake grass so I thought a small dog easier etc but I’m viewing online and my heart just isn’t with them. Has anyone got a beagle or a dog that’s energetic with a small garden I don’t want to feel guilty if I get one , he won’t be on his own I work 2 days a week and the one day he will be with my mam and then the other either doggy day care or I will get a family member to watch him. I’m finding it so difficult I said I wouldn’t have one again they are stubborn hard work mine were always off the lead and everyday involved me walking miles to find them but that’s what I loved (I was a teenager). I think though if I got another unless it was secure outdoor due to having a child he won’t be coming off the lead. Just need some advice do I or don’t I
 
#3 ·
I'm not sure about a Beagle, they're notoriously independent and not tops for recalling, and it's going to be impossible to go find/retrieve your dog with a child in tow.

Have you thought about a rescue dog? If you investigate local rescues you might just find one you click with, and you could avoid all the difficult puppy stages.
Hi yes I did consider rescue dogs But I'd like one from a pup so he gets used to the little one , I'd be too wary. I know what beagles are like i have had 2 , the only thing putting me off is having a small garden and going back to off the lead I did say as I have a child I don't think he would be off the lead
 
#5 ·
I’d say wait.

You will be busy enough with your child - play groups, school, after school clubs, sports at weekends, play dates and parties.

Along with your work too you will have enough on your plate ime.

Many places you’ll be going with your child will not allow dogs either.

Honestly, why make life more complicated?

I waited until my son was in Secondary school before getting a rescue and avoided all dramas :)

We had fish and fancy rats instead - much less hassle :)
 
#6 ·
I'd say wait.

You will be busy enough with your child - play groups, school, after school clubs, sports at weekends, play dates and parties.

Along with your work too you will have enough on your plate ime.

Many places you'll be going with your child will not allow dogs either.

Honestly, why make life more complicated?

I waited until my son was in Secondary school before getting a rescue and avoided all dramas :)

We had fish and fancy rats instead - much less hassle :)
Yes I know what you mean , however this is the first time I'm living on my own and it will just be me and my child if I'm honest I'd like the company, like I said I can get someone to watch him on the one day then doggy day care the other , school is literally down the road so will be walking there every morning (that's when he starts school) sports is likely to be outdoors can't see the harm in taking a dog really as long as their on the lead I have enough time for one. I'm not looking to get one until my child is 2 doing all my planning now , but I know I can see me with one as soon as I move if I'm honest just need to pick the right breed for us and for the dog I suppose
 
#7 ·
I'm another one who'd advise waiting until the child is older. Puppies are little land sharks and they don't discriminate between toys, an adult leg or a child's arm.

They're also much more fragile than adult dogs, so while your child is so young, he could potentially, accidentally hurt pup.

Plus puppies are like toddlers themselves and need constant supervision. We've had loads of members join up - members without kids as young as yours- in floods of tears because they can't cope and think they've made a mistake. Just take a look at the Puppy Support Thread sticky at the top of this section.

An adult rescue would be better. Still not easy - and you still might get the New Dog Blues - but easier than a puppy.
 
#11 ·
I’d seriously consider waiting. I had a pup last year and albeit yes I work full time but I have a partner and believe me the culture shock was huge.

your son in young and children require a lot of attention.. when they start school you have homework and other stuff to deal with.

also have you factored into the cost? I had done this but nothing could prepare me for the huge costs of extortionate insurance, food, allergies and believe me a lot more dogs suffer with them currently, vet bills?

I’m not trying to put you off as you seem pretty up for getting a dog but these are things I wish someone had said to me but it is a huge commitment and sometimes having a dog I thought would make me happy ect but its a huge huge investment. My son is 8 and honestly I wish I had waited until he was in secondary school
 
#13 ·
I have had babies and young dogs.
Both of my dogs had just turned two when baby one came along and 18 months later baby 2 came along. One of my dogs was delighted with having babies in the house, the other one hated the babies and now lives with my mum quite happily being spoilt rotten.
It's very easy to walk dogs with a pram, not so easy to walk dogs with toddlers who don't want to walk or want to run off in the opposite direction. I was probably more fortunate as both of my dogs had amazing recall and were house trained. I would imagine having a toddler and training a puppy is bloody hard, pups have accidents and toddlers tend to find accidents before parents IME.

Bear in mind that a pup can't go for a really long walk until atleast 12 months old as it could damage the joints so you would need somewhere for pup to play and let off steam in between shorter walks.
SA would be a big concern but not all dogs suffer with it, one of mine has issues when my daughter goes out but as long as somebody is at home, he's generally happy.
My neighbours have a JRT who howls for the full 8 hours that they are out at work. I'm sure their next door neighbour must be thrilled.
Would you have time to go to puppy classes and obedience and would you have childcare available to do this? Every puppy class and good citizen class I have attended has only allowed one handler and definitely no children as they generally act as a distraction for a pup. If you have thought about all of this and think you can still offer everything that a puppy and your child needs, go for it
 
#15 ·
Having a dog is fantastic company, but you will have less time to devote to your child, you both may miss out on things as you can't always take a dog to places, and do you have heaps of energy? As in the evening when you become tired your puppy will demand your time and attention, this may be fine the first few days though you'll quickly become exhausted. And when it's raining and you take the dog outside into the garden, how will you also supervise a toddler inside the house.

Dogs are great, but I would enjoy the first few years of motherhood before considering getting a four legged friend.
 
#17 ·
Unfortunately on a public forum you don’t get to choose what responses you receive. Those responses aren’t just for you but for anyone else googling the subject.

There are countless posts on this forum from people in exactly your position (and much easier tbh) who are at their wits end when they are struggling to cope with a new pup/dog so members are duty bound really to highlight the pitfalls, not least for all the pups/dogs that get passed on as a result.

There really is no need to be so rude to members who took time out to respond and offer advice.

Anyhoo - good luck with it all - I’m out :)
 
#18 ·
Crikey, lots of people have dogs and children. I was working sheep with my dog the day I went into labour - I had two other dogs as well. I had a new pup when my daughter was small. She had to be in her pram out with me on the farm while I did cattle and sheep and by the time she was a couple of months old I was lambing and then calving and my husband was out working so I had no help in the day. It is life, if you think you can do it then do it, if it is not something you want to do then don't but everyone is different and copes in different ways.
 
#24 ·
Toddlers can be really mean to cats, so it's not always doable.
Maybe if supervised, and if the person is ready to catify their home, maybe then.
I just wanted to intervene because people often think that cats or even rabbits are easy pets, but there is really a lot to think about, no mater is it a dog, a cat or a hamster.
If you want a companion, could you consider creating new bonds with humans? Or mending old bonds? Humans could help you instead of adding to your list resposibilities.
I don't know much about taking care of children, but to me, it seems like a hassle. And adding a dog to that sounds like a bad idea.
No matter what pet it is, it's always a HUGE responsibility. I'm not saying that you are irresponsible, on the contrary, to me it seems that you really want to take good care of everything and think it through. I think that's a good start.
But in your situation, maybe it would be best to wait?

You could start feeding birds on your back yard, or grow a garden. Those can also help with loneliness and aren't that much of a hassle or responsibility.
You could also read more about dogs, (even if you have already, more information is always good) and start a savings account for emergency vet bills in the meantime (even if your finances are good right now, they might not be in the future).
Remember to take care of yourself, too.
What ever you decide to do, I hope things go well. :)
I am experienced when it comes to dogs , I'm going to see how it goes wait until his birthday has come and see the situation then , I do have a lot of friends and very close with family but if I'm honest since having a baby and my friends have had children we meet up once a week at a field if the weather is nice or each other's houses people get on with their family lives , and I know having my own place now I'm not going to want to go travelling to family when they can come to me and we are a close family so if I am visiting I'll be taking the dog with me what ever happens I know the dog won't be on his own I get it's going to be tough I will look into a different breed now it's just from having 2 beagles their the dogs I adore. He is young but he's forward and loves animals and I'm not a cat person , fish are boring , and I'm not really a rabbit or Guinea pig I'd rather pick up dog poo than clean out a hutch. Personally being a single parent and he is with me all the time except if a relative asks to see him a puppy will fit in lovely and be company for the both of us I appreciate everyone's comments and I've taken them on board by changing the breed considering less energetic ones. Thank you
 
G
#19 · (Edited)
If you want a companion, could you consider creating new bonds with humans? Or mending old bonds? Humans could help you instead of adding to your list resposibilities.
I don't know much about taking care of children, but to me, it seems like a hassle. And adding a dog to that sounds like a bad idea.
No matter what pet it is, it's always a HUGE responsibility. I'm not saying that you are irresponsible, on the contrary, to me it seems that you really want to take good care of everything and think it through. I think that's a good start.
But in your situation, maybe it would be best to wait?

You could start feeding birds on your back yard, or grow a garden. Those can also help with loneliness and aren't that much of a hassle or responsibility.
You could also read more about dogs, (even if you have already, more information is always good) and start a savings account for emergency vet bills in the meantime (even if your finances are good right now, they might not be in the future).
Remember to take care of yourself, too.
What ever you decide to do, I hope things go well. :)
 
#20 ·
I had dogs when my children were born/young, but I was fortunate to be surrounded by fields and lanes so it wasn’t hard to exercise them off-lead, literally from my back gate, and my toddlers had to learn fast to walk distances.

Had I lived somewhere that I had to do on-lead walking it would have been more difficult.

Saying that, I can think back to my Mum collecting us older kids from school with the dog walking alongside my sister’s pushchair, and stopping at the Park on the way home for the dog to have a run.

Nothing’s impossible, it just depends how much time you have and how much adjustment to your daily routine you want to make.

I’m not sure if garden size is that relevant; you can play/ train in a small garden.
 
#21 ·
Just need some advice do I or don't I
Id say give it another 2 or 3 years, see if you feel the same and, if you do, go for it!

I already had a dog when my first baby came along - great dog, 14yrs old by then, fab off lead, great round my baby and toddler but so tying.

Want to go out for the day with your toddler - need to get back for the dog (im thinking toddler days that will reopen at some point like petting zoo, butterfly farm, soft play, you know all these places that young kids love arent for dogs)

On holiday - again dog and toddler places are often just not compatible.

Basically, our dog just ended up getting left at home more often. She was an older dog and settled fine but our focus naturally shifted to more child centred activities.

When our daughter was 2 and a half, our dog was 16 and in pain so was pts. How did we feel? Honestly? Relief. And more freedom too i suppose - to be able to go out for full days and not need to get back in any hurry.

Later we had more kids and i just had no time in my life for a dog - even though i have always been 'at home' all the time - at home with kids really means an endless round of going out - whether that be to the numerous appointments kids seem to have, trips out, toddler groups, school appts.

It wasnt until my youngest started school i even had time to think dog again.

We always kept cats though, right through and that is an easy combo as long as you're not near a busy road.

Only you can make the call on your individual circumstances but, if you get a puppy, that is potentially you tied then for 15yrs plus. More tying than having a child imo because kids do grow up and start to take on responsibilities. Dogs never do. They are dependent on you for so much all their lives.

All the best with whatever it is you decide
 
G
#22 ·
We always kept cats though, right through and that is an easy combo as long as you're not near a busy road.
Toddlers can be really mean to cats, so it's not always doable.
Maybe if supervised, and if the person is ready to catify their home, maybe then.
I just wanted to intervene because people often think that cats or even rabbits are easy pets, but there is really a lot to think about, no mater is it a dog, a cat or a hamster.
 
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