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My grand daughter stayed at her other grand parents on Saturday and they offered her non alcoholic wine,she 8 for goodness sake, my daughter told them in no uncertain terms what she thought are we the only ones who this this is unacceptable?

 

[gem88]

i have mixed feelings on this. im a mum to an 8 year old and the first bit of that that jumps out is it was non alcoholic, without alcohol its basically just fermented grapes, its the same with non alcoholic beer is just hops and water.
having said that working in a pub or off license all my life i also know that non alcoholic doesnt neceserally mean that, it could be just low as in less than 0.5% depending on which of these she had would depend on my reaction. i remember having wine from about 8 onwards on special occasions but it was the tiniest bit in a big tumbler watered down with lemonade.
sorry that post is more thinking out loud than an actual answer

 

[Holtie]

No you're not being unreasonable at all! I certainly wouldn't be happy at all - it doesn't matter if it was Non-alcoholic wine that's by the by - it's the fact that the other grandparents undermined your daughter's respect in doing this by teaching your grandchild that it acceptable to drink things like this!

I'm on your side!!

 

[gem88]

No you're not being unreasonable at all! I certainly wouldn't be happy at all - it doesn't matter if it was Non-alcoholic wine that's by the by - it's the fact that the other grandparents undermined your daughter's respect in doing this by teaching your grandchild that it acceptable to drink things like this!

I'm on your side!!

ah see i never think things that way lol

yes i agree with this in the aspect of someone else giving my child alcohol without my consent i'd be mad

 

[lymorelynn]

It is difficult. My boys were offered wine - watered down not non-alcoholic - from around the age of 6 or 7 as long as it was with a meal. They didn't usually have any, preferring soft drinks. Personally I don't think it did any harm, neither of them started drinking at a young age nor do they drink to excess now except on the very odd occasion.
What really matters here is that your daughter does not think it is right and her in-laws should have asked her before offering the drink to your grand-daughter.

 

[redroses2106]

in france kids get wine with a meal for about 5 years old, they have a lot less alcohol related problems there than we do.

I was allowed a glass of watered down wine with a meal from a very young age, also shandys, bucksfizz and at new year an alcopop.

I think letting kids have a sip and not making it into a big deal makes them less curious as they get older and teaches moderation.

personally I don't really see the problem but the granparents should of asked the parents first.

 

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I think my daughter was more annoyed that they did not ask first, there are just some things that i believe must be a decision made by the parent and no one else even if they are family

 

[waggy Tailz]

in france kids get wine with a meal for about 5 years old, they have a lot less alcohol related problems there than we do.

I was allowed a glass of watered down wine with a meal from a very young age, also shandys, bucksfizz and at new year an alcopop.

I think letting kids have a sip and not making it into a big deal makes them less curious as they get older and teaches moderation.

personally I don't really see the problem but the granparents should of asked the parents first.

I agree with Redrose, but they should of asked you first before offering her any.

 

[JANICE199]

To be honest i don't think it would bother me.2 things come to mind.You don't say if it was a sip, or a glass.Secondly i think its a good thing for children to be introduced to alcohol early.Of course i'm talking about very little amounts.

 

[[email protected]]

Many years ago I used to babysit for a very well known mp's children. This mp used to make his own red wine and always insisted that the children had a glass before they went to bed....and he used to check with them that I had given it to them!!! The kids were then about 9 and 7. I always thought it a bit weird and was convinced that these kids occasionally woke grumpier than normal!!

Now a mother of two teenagers I understand that the little girl may feel more grown up for the moment but she will only remember the word 'wine', not necessarily the bit about non-alcoholic. Does that bode well for her future consumptions? Will they be offering her alcoholic wine when she is 12? Whatever is wrong with squash from granny and grandpa??!! hmy:

 

[auspiciousmind]

I guess it depends on what way you look at it.

It was non-alcoholic.. but it was AGAINST what your daughter had asked - which would infuriate me.. Were having a similar issue with my OH's child... the grandparents no matter how many times you ask them not to do something they still continue to do it.. which has led to some behavior issues and several arguements.

And like someone said I don't think your granddaughter is going to remember the words "non-alcoholic".. just the word "Wine".

As a child.. Myself , my sister and cousins would get a tea spoon and steal the foam off of peoples pints.. :blush2:

On Christmas day and New years eve we were allowed a small glass of white wine heavily diluted with lemonade.

I remember occasionally a grown up allowing us to have a tiny sip of lager (never spirits).. and we'd all go "EWWW IM NEVER DRINKING WHEN I'M OLDER!!

From the age of about 14/15 I was allowed a few alcopops on special occasions and from about 17 I went to parties with mates and drank.. and to this day I've maybe came home and been sick once or twice in 5 years? and It literally is .. in the door, sick , glass of water and then bed.

My mum always comments on how lucky she's been with both of us compared to the stories some of my friends mums have told her!

 

[we love bsh's]

I dont get what the problem its not as if its going to turn her into an alcoholic!

My lad is 8 and i give him a cup of wkd now and again.It causes no harm.

It seems as though there may be more to the story do your not get along with the in laws?

 

[Space Chick]

It's grape juice if it's non alcoholic.... Would you be upset if she'd had apple juice? As after all that is non alcoholic cider

I'm sorry, but I can't see the issue.... If she'd been offered alcohol different story, but she wasn't, she was offered a non alcoholic wine.

 

[kodakkuki]

I'm not sure this will help at all, but...
My dad is a recovering alcoholic- over 25yrs sober (and I couldn't be prouder of that!) so when my sisters were little there was no alcohol in the house at all. By the time I was 7 or so my mum had started keepin drink in the house again, so me seeing her and her friends have a drink wasn't a big deal- and on special occasions I had a babycham or as i got older Smirnoff ice as did my big sisters.
Of the 3 of us i am the only one hi didn't majorly binge as a teen, and one of my sisters still drink Very frequently... I do think that my early introduction played a part in this- drinking wasn't a big deal, and certainly nothing to hide from mum and dad, but then again wen I was 16,17 and was goin to a party for a drink my dad would have bought me my drink; the way he saw it wasn't was going to have the drink anyway, so better him buy me it than me asking a some random stranger to pop into the offies for me!

But it should Always be the parents decision.

Eta- those sayin it's only non alcoholic, a kid will only hear wine IMO. A friend was given a tin on non alcoholic beer at weekends, and she has said that's what gave her the taste for it- and because it was so easily drank, she can down a pint faster than any guy I know! Don't know the actual relevance, but she says it was the non-a that made her like it!

 

[skip]

I dont get what the problem its not as if its going to turn her into an alcoholic!

My lad is 8 and i give him a cup of wkd now and again.It causes no harm.

It seems as though there may be more to the story do your not get along with the in laws?

They have tried to undermine my daughter in the past, they also have a son living with them who is an alcoholic and my daughter is a little worried about what her daughter may or may not be exposed to

 

[Starlite]

Firstly they should ask, its not their choice to make.
secondly not all non alcoholic actually is.

I personally dont see the need to introduce kids to alcohol early as to me this makes it acceptable. Growing up with 2 badly alcoholic paretnts who thought nothing of having a drink with you I cant say it did me any good. I saw it as OK to get wasted, just like mum and dad eh?

I barely drink anymore (special occasions). My parents and many still think nothing of dipping a babies dummy into beer foam and dabbing gums with whisky, starting them young doesnt make a bit of good imo

 

[we love bsh's]

They have tried to undermine my daughter in the past, they also have a son living with them who is an alcoholic and my daughter is a little worried about what her daughter may or may not be exposed to

ok - .

But just to ad my dad died from being an alcoholic 2 years ago.I grew up both my parents were addicted to it ..but im not not never will be.

 

[newfiesmum]

My grand daughter stayed at her other grand parents on Saturday and they offered her non alcoholic wine,she 8 for goodness sake, my daughter told them in no uncertain terms what she thought are we the only ones who this this is unacceptable?

You do realise that French children drink wine as a matter of course from a very young age, and it is not non alcoholic either. I see nothing wrong with your situation at all, but I remember having a row with my MIL for giving my daughter actual wine at that age, and when I objected, her saying: A little bit won't hurt and giving it to her anyway.

I don't drink alcohol at all but I see nothing wrong with non alcoholic wine.

 

[hazyreality]

My mum and dad used to make their own wine when I was younger and I was allowed a taste of them and always lambrisco at christmas! lol.
I never have really drank even when it was "legal" to because it wasn't a novelty. I didnt reach 18 and think "thats it, now I can drink, I'm going to get p****d!"

Now I am 25 and I don't drink at all because I dont like drunk people (I have my 17th bday to thank for that!) so I'm not going to be one and I don't even like the taste of most of them anyway (although had a sip of thatchers cider last week and thats not bad lol)

I don't think its a huge problem by itself but I think the parents should have been asked, although to be fair the grandparents were proberly just thinking "its non-alchoholic so its really just grape juice" which it really is. As someone said, like apple juice is non-alchoholic cider

 

[JANICE199]

You do realise that French children drink wine as a matter of course from a very young age, and it is not non alcoholic either. I see nothing wrong with your situation at all, but I remember having a row with my MIL for giving my daughter actual wine at that age, and when I objected, her saying: A little bit won't hurt and giving it to her anyway.

I don't drink alcohol at all but I see nothing wrong with non alcoholic wine.

And they,along with other countries don't have the problems with alcohol that we do.