My beloved Cloud

Discussion in 'Rainbow Bridge' started by Char8607, Dec 4, 2016.


  1. Char8607

    Char8607 Mum to Storm (b. 2010) and Luna (b.2017)

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    Hi all

    I came across your forum following the loss of one of my beautiful boys two days ago.

    Cloud was my beautiful, amazing, mischievous 6 and a half year old cat, one of two brothers I rescued in June 2010. They came to me 'for one night' due to their owner suddenly being unable to take care of them.....and they never left (just to clarify the owner did not want them back).

    About a month ago my partner and I noticed Cloud didn't seem his usual self; he'd gone off his food and seemed to be breathing quite fast. Having only been at the vets two weeks previously for his booster and general check up we didn't think much of if but got him checked out anyway.

    What followed was 4 weeks and 1 day of endless appointments, tests and trips to the emergency vets in the middle of the night; our darling boy had heart failure. We were told it had been caught relatively early so whilst we knew it meant our time with him would be much shorter than we had ever anticipated, we thought we would have a few good months with him once his medication was tweaked.

    Sadly we didn't get that chance and on Thursday evening (my 30th birthday) we made our final trip to the emergency vets with our baby boy. His breathing rate was very fast but the vet thought a shot of intravenous diuretic would probably stabilise him as we had an appointment with a cardiology team on the Friday morning. The vet said we could bring him home or keep him there overnight for observations; we chose the latter and that was the last time we saw Mr Cloud awake.

    Calls in the middle of the night are never good news and so when the vet rang at 3:50am I braced myself. He was still with us but going downhill rapidly; they had one other drug to try and would let me know. The phone rang again at 5:20am to say there really was no option; we made our way over but Mr Cloud had lost his fight only minutes after the phone call and the vet, who was lovely, had had to put him at peace because it became too distressing and cruel not to.

    My partner (Rich) and I got to see our beauty wrapped in a blanket and tell him how he meant the absolute world to us and how sorry that despite our best efforts we hadn't been able to save him.

    People may think I'm daft and I may just be kidding myself to find comfort but I truly believe he battled hard to stay with me for my special birthday but knew he wasn't well and didn't want us spending thousands on the cardiologist. He had seemed so full of beans that day and we did (by chance) all of his favourite things; he played with Storm, he got into bed for morning cuddles and purrs, he had a brush, went in the garden, had the biggest meal of prawns and had one final car ride sat on a blanket as opposed to being in his carrier.
    When we took him that evening I didn't think for one second he wouldn't ever come home; he had been admitted to the vets the previous week for 3 days and fought so hard to get home we truly believed that his medication was stabilising him (it had been increased following his discharge).

    Rich and I are in pieces; Mr Cloud we believe was partly Maine Coon and shared many traits of the breed; the fluffy coat, the tufty paws and the almost human like personality. He was my furry shadow with me from the moment I woke up until the second my head hit the pillow at night. if I got up during the night he would race to me and 'his spot' beside me in bed. He had a purr which sounded like a motorcycle engine and not and day went by where he didn't purr and make us laugh in some way. He loved to be carried around on his back like a baby and would cry to be picked up constantly or let to sit on the breakfast bar stools in the kitchen so he could watch me cooking each evening.

    It breaks my heart I didn't get to say goodbye to him or be there when he needed me most. I can't remember my last words to him but I know I didn't tell him I loved him but rather joked about him wanting an overnight stay in his kitty hotel rather than being at home with us and that is killing me that he may have thought I didn't care or was cross with him.

    Storm doesn't seem to know what's going on; he's got used to Cloud disappearing but he's always come home and now everytime the door goes he looks to see if his brother is there. They were both, from he large part, house cats only venturing into the garden if we were there to watch (we live by two main roads) and were pretty much inseparable.

    I hope and pray that the pain gets easier; I hate being at home but know Storm is grieving too and I can't leave him too long at any one time. Storm is a beautiful cat but very different in temperament to Cloud in that he will have a fuss then sleep all day; he's not the same 'shadowy' personality of his brother which is fine but just makes that ache inside me all the more painful.

    I'm sorry this post is so long, but I just wondered if maybe writing things down and sharing may help me start to come to terms with this huge loss.

    Rest In Peace my beautiful fluffy baby boy; mummy will love your forever and always.
     

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  2. Honeys mum

    Honeys mum PetForums VIP

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    So sorry for the loss, of your gorgeous boy.

    Have fun at te bridge beautiful boy, knowing you were truly loved.

    The Rainbow Bridge
     
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  3. Char8607

    Char8607 Mum to Storm (b. 2010) and Luna (b.2017)

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    Thank you Honey's mum x
     
  4. MilleD

    MilleD PetForums VIP

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    Sorry to hear of your loss. It's terrible when they leave us too soon isn't it?

    Maybe the loss of Cloud will change Storm's personality and you may come to rely on him in the same way.

    Run free Cloud, RIP xx
     
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  5. Char8607

    Char8607 Mum to Storm (b. 2010) and Luna (b.2017)

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    It really is horrible especially so relatively young. I hope Storm and I can help one another through this pain as he must be feeling so very lost.

    Thank you for your kind words x
     
  6. sue m

    sue m lucy

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    Hi, sorry to just read your letter and how sad. R.I.P. Cloud. I have just been sat crying as I have every day most of the day for the last six weeks so I know exactly how you are feeling. We lost our beautiful long haired Persian cat Lucy at 4.00 pm Tuesday six weeks ago. I have a long story to tell and its very similar in many ways to yours and Cloud. I never not expected to see Lucy at home again the day she died in recovery at the vets. It has taken me all this time to try to remember the words I said to her as we left the vets. I at first didn't think I even said goodbye but apparently according to my husband I said the nice lady is going to make you better. Like you I wish I had said I loved her. How it hurts and like you said I so hope it gets better with time. Writing it down does a little and everyone on this wonderful forum have been so kind. I can sure relate to the fluffy coat and paws and personality of Cloud. Persians are human I am sure. Lucy was an indoor cat and like Cloud was my constant companion 24/7 no matter what I did. Cloud certainly was a beautiful boy. xx
     
  7. JerryRosie2014

    JerryRosie2014 PetForums Junior

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    I'm so so sorry for your loss :( you sound very much like how I feel, I lost my baby Jerry aged just 2 1/2 nearly 4 weeks ago, he chocked to death on his biscuits so was completely unexpected, I have his sister still who is a lovely gentle sweet little girl but like storm she just goes off on her own- Jerry was by my side from morning till night and even followed me to the bathroom so I completely feel your pain ! It's horrendous :-( xxxx
     
  8. Char8607

    Char8607 Mum to Storm (b. 2010) and Luna (b.2017)

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    I'm so sorry for your loss of Jerry it really is so awful. I've grown up with pets and love animals but I didn't expect it to hit this hard. Over 2 weeks later and I'm still crying every day and feeling so guilty over my last words to him.

    I hope you and Jerry's sister can find comfort in one another; if you need to chat I'm here xx
     
  9. KitKatCat

    KitKatCat PetForums Junior

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    So sorry for your loss of your beloved cat. It must be painful to lose a cat you rescued.
     
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  10. Char8607

    Char8607 Mum to Storm (b. 2010) and Luna (b.2017)

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    Thank you KitKatCat it's been a very hard time miss him so very much.