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Missing Lulu-she went to Rainbow Bridge a year ago tonight-feel so sad

Discussion in 'Rainbow Bridge' started by Lulus mum, Jan 28, 2012.


  1. Lulus mum

    Lulus mum PetForums VIP

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    Our collie cross Lulu died at 11 45 a year ago tonight
    I managed to hold it together all day and then posted on another site I had joined just after she died and it all hit me
    I feel I let her down-that I should have taken her to the vet that night and not decided to leave it till the next morning
    She hadnt been ill,-was just panting a lot that night-which we put down to the fact that we had the heating an d fire on as it was a cold January night
    Our other dog-(they had come to us together 15 yrs before from the Rescue I worked for)has dementia and we didnt want to stress him out getting him in the car to take him to the Emergency Vets,
    We put Lulu on the couch with her head on my knee-the panting had stopped and she seemed to be just very tired and went to sleep
    I actually commented on how nice and relaxed she was and I carried on watching T.V,with me stroking her head
    Suddenly she just stopped breathing and she had gone
    I couldnt believe it -still cant
    The feeling that I could and should have done more has always been with me and its terrible
    It was made worse by the fact that I had been upstairs here on the computer earlier and had only gone down at 9 p.m-perhaps if I had been down there earlier it wouldnt have happened
    Hope Lulu has many friends at Rainbow Bridge and has forgiven me for letting her down

    My thought are with any of you who have lost a pet

    If any of you have had a similar experience-and feel they could have done more and can help me with this terrible feeling of guilt

    PLEASE could you P.M me as this is always in my mind
    Maureen
     
  2. rose

    rose PetForums VIP

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    We always feel guilty when a loved pet dies, go through the what ifs??
    Your lovely dog died peacefully and calmly laid on the sofa with the one she loved. What a perfect way to go. You could have rushed her to the vets and made you both distressed and the outcome would more than likely been the same. Just have a drink to her memory and take comfort that she was a very loved dog and had a good life. Hugs to you.
     
  3. Lulus mum

    Lulus mum PetForums VIP

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    Thanks Rose
    What you said was really true-I wouldnt have wanted her to die on the way to the vets with our other dog who has dementia in the car and being really stressed
    or even at the vets-perhaps kept in overnight and dying there
    I know she died with her family and that does help
    Take care-thank you again
    Maureen
     
  4. katie s

    katie s PetForums Newbie

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    Hi maureen,am new to this site and believe it or not was looking for good wellys for dog walking!Saw your message and have never replied to a forum before but you got to me. My 2 old girls died in April and May 2010 aged 14 and 15.Would have loved a natural and peaceful death for them but unfortunately both had to end their days at the vets.They were my life havnt got kids tho they were always my dogs not replacement babies.They saw me through thick and thin and a bad relationship too.My guilt is I couldnt take them to the vets couldnt bear it but my partner loved them too so they were in good company.My message to you is you have nothing at all to feel guilty about.I prayed for Kizzy to die in her sleep she was in a bad way after a couple of strokes and we broke our hearts over that decision to take her.we rang and asked the vets to come out but they wouldnt so she ended her days in somewhere she hated.your dog had a lovely life and a good end too so dont ever feel guilty for that.
    After 2 weeks of a very quiet life I decided couldnt be without a dog and started my search for a new dog.Shes on the settee as we speak thoroughly spoilt and it scares me to death how much I love her.Still think of my girls daily but they had a great life and Im sure yours did too.Had a tear tonight for the first time in a while reckon it does you good.
    Best wishesxxxxxxx
    ps maybe I should get back to that welly search now!!!
     
  5. Lulus mum

    Lulus mum PetForums VIP

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    Thank you so much Katie
    The dogs we had before Buster and Lulu were both strays taken in off the streets about 8 mths apart
    Sandy was a stray who was wandering in the playground in the school where I was teaching
    Brought him home and about 8 mths later took in another lovely dog who we called Ginger-she was hanging round our road,playing with my kids and their friends
    When all the kids went in she would come and lay on the mat outside the front door
    She was there in the a.m when I went to school and there when I came back
    We ended up taking her in -she was about 7 mths old
    She walked in and went over to the fire where Sandy was and lay down next to him-nearer to the fire than he was
    He just looked up as if to say-Hi and lay back down-it was really uncanny
    They got on from the start as if they both realised that we would love them both
    About 16 yrs later Sandy wasnt very well ,
    I had been coming home every lunchtime but this one day I couldnt as we had a staff Christmas dinner
    Our daughter Jane wasnt well and she was at home
    I put Sandy on the couch and after school dashed home-to see him in the same position and thought -he has had a lovely sleep till Jane said to me
    Mum he s died
    I felt really guilty that I hadnt been there
    What has prompted this long ramble is what you said about your Kizzy
    I wished that Ginger would die in her sleep-every a.m would look at her in her bed and pray that she had gone peacefully
    I know now that we let her go on too long,as I couldnt face having her P.T.S

    We eventually rang the vet we had dealt with for years-who had treated our dogs,mice,hamsters etc etc
    The vet came ,gave her the injection-she was lying on my knee and as she breathed her last he said
    That will be £89 please
    I was in bits just looking at Ginger and feeling so guilty
    My O.H was in bits and our son also was upstairs
    Perhaps this was in the back of my mind this time last year and made me even more reluctant to go to the Emergency vets -I dont know

    Im sorry that Kizzy couldnt have left for the Bridge at home with you like Lulu did with us but I know that she and her sister knew that you loved them and that they will be looking after their mum
    What is your new dog called by the way?

    Thank you again for your reply-hope you enjoy this forum as much as I have-there is always someone on here to offer advice or comfort

    Maureen

    P.S
    Hope you get your new wellies
     
  6. katie s

    katie s PetForums Newbie

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    Thanks Maureen,
    My new dog is a welsh springer called Poppy.Shes been a real healing dog for me both with the death of my 2 girls and other very sad times.Unfortunately at 1 and 1/2 she was diagnosed with hip dysplasia as she'd started walking funny and was yelping out sometimes if we threw things for her and I was mortified. We were hoping to take her for holidays and long walks etc and she is such a loving dog I thought it would be all over for her.My vet suggested swimming and she is doing well at my local hydro centre.Fingers crossed it will be ok and this web site should help with that too.Those wellys have got a lot to answer for!
    Best wishes
    Kxx
     
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