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Hello ev'ry body peeps. Stavross 'ere init.
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2,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Mary had a little lamb,
she also had a bear.

You seldom saw the little lamb,
but you'd see her bear behind.


I know of a couple of others but they are too rude for this forum. LOL!!
 

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Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon
10 thousands volts went up its bum
And turned its wool to nylon

..................

Mary had a little lamb
She also had some veg and gravy
 

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Hello ev'ry body peeps. Stavross 'ere init.
Joined
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2,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon
10 thousands volts went up its bum
And turned its wool to nylon

..................

Mary had a little lamb
She also had some veg and gravy
I haven't heard that one before. I love it.
 

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22,188 Posts
Mary had a little Lamb
She kept it in a bucket
And every time the Lamb climbed out
The Bulldog tried to........................ :sneaky2:
 

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Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon
10 thousands volts went up its bum
And turned its wool to nylon

..................

Mary had a little lamb
She also had some veg and gravy
my grandpop used to tell me that when i was a kid, thought it was hilarious then and still makes me giggle now when he tells it to me :lol:
 

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Hello ev'ry body peeps. Stavross 'ere init.
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2,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Mary had a little Lamb
She kept it in a bucket
And every time the Lamb climbed out
The Bulldog tried to........................ :sneaky2:
haha . This is one of the 2 I was thinking of. The other one involves a blanket.
 

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Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was black as soot
And into Mary's bread and jam
His sooty foot he put.

That used to make me laugh as a kid!

Also

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a Tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
There came a big spider
Who sat down beside her
And what did Miss Muffet say?
SHOVE OFF HAIRYLEGS!

That made me wet myself laughing:lol:
(Back when I was a nipper - not just now!)
 

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Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead
So now it goes to school with her
Between two hunks of bread

Mary had a little lamb
She thought it was the tops
It gambolled in the road one day
And ended up as chops

Mary had a little lamb
She ate it with mint sauce
And everywhere that Mary went
The lamb went too of course

Mary had a little lamb
It's fleece was white and wispy
Till it caught foot and mouth disease
And now it's black and crispy

Mary had a little lamb
The doctor was surprized
Old MacDonald had a farm
The doctor nearly died

Mary had a little lamb
She also had a duck
She put them on the mantlepiece
And told them not to ...

Mary had a little pig
She couldn't stand it gruntin
So she took it round the garden shed
And kicked it's f****** c**t in

Mary had a little skirt
With splits right up the sides
And every time that Mary walked
The boys could see her thighs
Mary had another skirt
With splits right up the front
And every time that Mary walked
The boys could see her ...

:D
 

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OK, Prob get moaned at for this but......

Mary had a little lamb
it's fleece was oh so red,
this was not surprising
as it had a hatchet in its head. :eek: :D
 

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3,483 Posts
:aureola:

you all getting it wrong!

Mary had a little lamb
it's fleece was white as snow
and everywhere that Mary went
the lamb was sure to go.

It followed her to school one day
which was against the rule
who ever heard of such a thing
to take a lamb to school.
 

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Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet
With a lightbulb stuck up her ass
It woke up the spider
Who lived deep inside her
He said hey free electrict and gas

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet
Her clothes all tattered and torn
It was not the spider
Who crept up beside her
But little boy blue and his horn:ihih:

Little boy blue. Hey he needed the money.:devil:
 

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:aureola:

you all getting it wrong!

Mary had a little lamb
it's fleece was white as snow
and everywhere that Mary went
the lamb was sure to go.

It followed her to school one day
which was against the rule
who ever heard of such a thing
to take a lamb to school.
lol ;) :lol::lol::lol::lol:
 

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Mary had a little watch
she swallowed it one day
and so she took some Epsom salts
to pass the time away
But though she tried, and tried, and tried
she couldn't make time pass
So if you want to know the time
just look up Mary's ass
 

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26,620 Posts
OK, Prob get moaned at for this but......

Mary had a little lamb
it's fleece was oh so red,
this was not surprising
as it had a hatchet in its head. :eek: :D
i should not have laughed at that should i?
 

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mary had little lamb,
she thought it very silly
she threw it by the left leg
and caught it by the
willy was a sheepdog
lying in the grass
down came a bumblebee
and stung him in the
ask no questions
tell no lies
i saw a policeman
doing up his
flies are a problem
wasps are worse
this is the end
of my silly little verse
 

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26,620 Posts
Mary had a little lamb,
it used to leap so high,
it leapt into a butchers shop,
and now it's mutton pie.
 

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Jack be nimble,
Jack be quick,
Jack jump over the candle stick,
Silly boy should have jumped higher,
Goodness gracious: Great balls of fire.
 

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puff the magic dragon sits on the shelf
has no-one to play with, so he plays with himself.
Got himself girlfriend, that was not enough
got himself a boyfriend, that's why they call him puff!
 
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