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Is it fair for us to get a dog??

Discussion in 'Dog Chat' started by Robzei, Sep 16, 2018.


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Would it be the right decision to get a dog?

  1. Yes, you can make it work

    2 vote(s)
    11.8%
  2. No, the dog would suffer

    15 vote(s)
    88.2%
  1. Robzei

    Robzei PetForums Newbie

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    hey everyone!!

    Myself and my wife have been debating getting a French bulldog for years, however due to us both working full time, and having to do school runs for our children, we have always thought it wasn’t the time.

    However now our youngest has developed an obsession with dogs, constantly stopping those walking dogs just so they can stroke them, and have started asking for a dog also. It doesn’t look likely that our working life is going to change, both working 40 hours per week, mostly Monday-Friday.

    Is it fair for us to get a dog now? Considering our position may never change?

    I work close-ish to home, therefor i could always travel home on my lunch breaks, and allow our dog a quick run around the garden, and a toilet break, but I’m talking roughly 10 minutes. We don’t have anyone else that would be able to drop in on the dog whilst we are working.

    Would it be ok for a French bulldog to be left alone for roughly 4-5 hours, to then have a 10-20 minute break, and then to be left for a further 3-4 hours? I don’t want to give the dog anxiety or anything like that, so please give your honest thoughts for experiences if in a similar situation.

    Thank you very much everyone!
     
  2. Sarah H

    Sarah H Grand Empress of the Universe

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    Put bluntly? No.

    A puppy needs a lot of time and effort, popping home just isn't enough. An adult rescue would suit better, but even then you would have to take time off work to settle the dog in.

    If one of you could take holiday for 2 weeks to settle pup in, then the other take the next weeks holiday to get pup used to getting left then it could work, but you'd likely need someone (dog walkers or sitters will do house calls) to come in mid-morning and mid-afternoon to let pup out to toilet. As well as you coming home at lunch to do it. Dogs need and crave company, especially frenchies. The novelty will soon wear off when puppy is nipping, chewing, pooing, peeing and screaming and you have had a long day at work. Maybe look for a nice rescue cat instead?
     
  3. stuaz

    stuaz PetForums VIP

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    Not a big fan of getting a dog for a child, purely because the novelty will wear off. It should be something the whole family wants.

    That said, working full time isn't an obstacle for dog ownership you just have to make some alterations to your schedule. E.g. Coming home at lunch or getting a dog walker in once a day. Taking some time off when getting the dog is really useful as well.

    I own two highly energetic dogs and have done from puppies but also work full time. They get a break in the day from ether me coming home at lunchtime or a dog walker coming so they are on there own for periods of 5 hours.
     
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  4. Lurcherlad

    Lurcherlad PetForums VIP

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    Getting a dog (or any pet) mainly for a child isn’t a good idea imo.

    As said, the novelty almost always wears off but the dog could live for 16 years.

    As for getting a French Bulldog - they can have so many health issues :(

    An older rescue might work - better than languishing in kennels - but would have to be chosen carefully to be fairly sure of temperament, etc. The dog will still need time to settle into it’s new life and routine before being left in order to avoid issues though.

    I’d be inclined to be strong and not give in tbh

    I had to wait until I left home to get a horse ;)
     
  5. Rafa

    Rafa PetForums VIP

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    I have had many dogs and a couple of kids.

    I would never buy a dog for a child. Kiddies are fickle, this Christmas they must have a certain toy, are desperate for it and, by January, they're bored with it.

    That would certainly happen with a dog. After all, your child can't be responsible for walking the dog in the dark and all weathers, taking it to the Vet or paying for it.

    8 hours with only a 10 minute break isn't good enough I'm afraid.
     
  6. Tyson1919

    Tyson1919 Banned

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    I don’t think he wants to get a pup for his child... he has said that him and his wife were thinking about it for years and now he’s child also wants a pup so I am guessing that all the family want a puppy.
    If you were going to get a puppy I would try get some time off work,maybe a week or two, and after you had the week or two with the puppy your wife could also get a week or two off of possible so the puppy could be well settled.
     
  7. Rafa

    Rafa PetForums VIP

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    Oh, okay, so at the end of two or four weeks of constant company, you have a twelve week old pup who is going to be left alone for eight hours a day.

    I don't believe that's so good.
     
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  8. labradrk

    labradrk PetForums VIP

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    Basically no, it’s not a good idea. I mean with an adult dog hypothetically you can have a dog and work full time, but it’s bloody hard work. In fact it can be exhausting and while it’s very possible to make it work, it also impacts on every area of your life. With a young child on top of that it is another big tie that will further limit what you are and aren’t able to do. A dog will seriously impact on your mornings before and evenings after work, and obviously all weekend plans need to consider the dogs needs too. You can’t just up and go out for the day or stay anywhere without catering to the dog.

    My advice would be to wait at this point in time. Never buy a dog with a child in mind because as soon as the dog is home the novelty will wear off in weeks. Plus it will be you doing all the work anyway.
     
  9. Summercat

    Summercat PetForums VIP

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    @Robzei
    Maybe you could try fostering for a rescue and see how it works out. If after the experience you feel it would work for your family, then I would give it a go.
     
  10. Happy Paws2

    Happy Paws2 PetForums VIP

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    Sorry but no, I'd never leave a dog at any age for that long, think how you would feel on your own all day with nothing to do, it would drive you mad.
     
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  11. DaisyBluebell

    DaisyBluebell Earth, the insane asylum of the Universe

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    Try honestly thinking of it from the prospective dogs point of view instead of yours, remembering that bringing a puppy into your home is akin to having a new baby :eek:
     
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  12. AlexPed2393

    AlexPed2393 PetForums VIP

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    It could maybe work with an adult dog from rescue. BUT and its a big but.
    The dog has to be good to be left for long periods of time, the rescue has to know the dog can handle this and the dog has to be good with young kids, again the rescue has to know this.

    After doing some volunteering with a local rescue that dog is an absolute 1 in a bazillion and gets snatched up quick. Worth a look though
     
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  13. kimthecat

    kimthecat PetForums VIP

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    How long would the dog be left for ?
    I don't think you have enough time for a dog , you could have a dog walker come in the day but that is expensive .
    Do you fancy walking a dog before you go to work and when you come home ? Its ok in summer but not so much fun in winter.
     
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  14. SusieRainbow

    SusieRainbow Moderator
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    I doubt if any rescues would place a foster with a famiy out of the house all day.
     
  15. Summercat

    Summercat PetForums VIP

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    4-5 hours alone, then a toilet break then 3/4 hours alone. Frankly, that is more than many dogs get. In an ideal world, you could stay at home all day if wanted but many families need two incomes.
    If rescues have the requirement you are home all day, then it will be mainly the unemployed or retired that can adopt.
    I think for pets, if you are working in the day then two is better, two cats, two dogs etc.
    I would not exclude a family based on work, especially if the owner could come home in the day at least once to let it out.
    Not sure languishing in rescue is better than being adopted/fostered by a family with children.
    Granted yes, in an ideal world staying home is better but not always workable for many families.
     
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  16. lullabydream

    lullabydream PetForums VIP

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    It's not about what most dogs get in a day. It's about what is right.

    Recommending have 2 dogs so they have company is so wrong on many levels. It again shows naivety of someone who does not understand about dogs and their behaviour and needs. Dogs are companion animals with humans. They thrive in human company however even those with multi dog households will tell you that the most you can expect is dogs to tolerate one another.
    To recommend for someone to get not one but two dogs and not give them adequate care is beyond me. So wrong on so many levels. It might work for cats but not for dogs because although they may have company what they really want is human company.

    The OP is talking about a French bulldog. Which is a companion breed. One that thrives more than say a sighthound with humans.

    Just because many people do doesn't make it right. Although many dog owners are often not seen up at the crack of dawn or earlier putting in the effort to walk and stimulate their dogs and many neighbours can often judge them as never taking the dogs out at all. When it all happens when most people are tucked up in bed still sleeping.

    Cats and dogs are both fantastic pets but they are miles apart in their needs.
     
  17. Summercat

    Summercat PetForums VIP

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    @lullabydream
    I grew up with dogs, I don't think they are cats.....
    I also don't think dogs all dislike each other and I think not being alone is different than being alone.
    I offered a suggestion.
    A family with children I think is good for a dog, not everyone can be there 24/7for a pet. There are weekends and before and after school time.
    I didn't say he had to get a French Bull dog per say, I didn't mention breed or age. I suggested fostering to see how it would be for the pet and family.
    With the rules you layed out there will have to be far fewer dogs in the world as a limited number of humans will qualify as dog owners.
    We will have to agree to diagree.
     
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  18. lullabydream

    lullabydream PetForums VIP

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    Growing up with dogs is totally different to owning dogs.

    If you understood anything from growing up with dogs is very much different to owning your own. Being totally responsible and doing things right.

    I understand people have a different of opinion but I am sure you have a lot to learn about dogs as it's clear from your posts in dog chat you have very much to learn and I can only extrapolate that you seem to think dogs and cats thrive on company of their own species from what you wrote. Which neither is true.

    As mentioned in dog rescue no fosters would be willing to allow a dog to go to full time workers. Unless shifts were split. So someone was home the majority of time. Dogs who usually require foster care need extra TLC from their carers.

    I think you will find dog rescues do have a lot of rules and regulations and can be frustrating. Many secure garden to keep them safe, full time workers whether rightly or wrongly does annoy me because it's a catch 22 of finances to afford a dog in my opinion although some with reasonable work such as dog walkers in place allow full time workers. Dogs can also find them foul of dog laws and noise disturbance laws so rightly so some people are not suitable to owning a dog due to their home life. Many here have waited till retirement, change in circumstances to make the leap to having a dog. As they couldn't give a companion animal the time a dog needs.

    . I believe some cat rescue will only allow cats who will be free roaming . Not a risk I would take unfortunately. So sorry not going to help a rescue. My cat would be too precious. So also swings and roundabouts where it comes to animals.

    Just because someone wants something such as a dog, cat, parrot or guinea pig etc With all the will in the world doesn't mean they should or can give the best home. Surely it's the welfare of the animal that is paramount and that matters.
     
  19. Rafa

    Rafa PetForums VIP

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    Getting two dogs or pups is a bad idea for a lot of reasons.

    Because being left alone for 8/9 hours a day is "more than some dogs get" doesn't make it right.
     
  20. Summercat

    Summercat PetForums VIP

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    I am just curious, as it seems the general consensus seems to be unless you work from home, don't work ie disabled or such or retired you should not have a dog. I think on average for five weekdays to have on average 3.5 x 4.5 hours alone with a toilet break in the middle is considered dog abuse, what do other dogs do?

    Are they active for the whole day, ie not getting one or two strolls per day interspersed with telly watching and eating. I have seen more overweight pooches in life who seem to loll about the house most of the day vs those who are in an active household.
    I know many on here do sports with and take a great deal of interest in their dogs but that does not seem typical.
    If this family will engage with the dog(s) before leaving, give he/she or they a toilet break and engage in the evening. I don't think it is horrific.
    I think the dog, if the children do show and keep up interest will be more engaged in play and activity than a great deal of dogs in the west, who are kept as pets and not working dogs. Hence the huge numbers who are overweight and if they do move they move with effort. Being in constant proximity to a dog does not always equal quality of life.

    Someone mentioned a dog walker and there are also depending where you live, doggy daycares
    which can be an option a few days a week.
    I think it is best to try it out, maybe even pet sit for a friend's dog who is going ,away or such. I think it is better to see if it will work for both you and the dog before committing to a pet, as you are unsure.
     
    Picklelily likes this.
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