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Had to Rehome last dog, how soon is to soon to get another one?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Kari Gascho, Jun 7, 2017.


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  1. Kari Gascho

    Kari Gascho Guest

    Our family had to rehome our doggy that we had for 5 years, do to him biting my 3 year old daughter. We got the dog before the kids were here and then we had 2 girls in one year, which I think took a toll on him. He was great fr the most part when awake, he knew to walk away 90% of the time when the kids bothered him, but when he was tired or asleep, he would get upset if someone touched him(even if it was my husband or myself) The last time, my daughter went to hug him after he was sleeping. He hugged his face from behind, and he turned and bit. It was a pretty bad bit that lead to stitches.

    This happened just over a month ago, we decided to rehome him to a young man that has no kids. And he is doing great with him!!

    But we still have the emptiness of no dog in our home.

    When is it ok to get another puppy? Is only a month to soon?

    Is it safe to have another dog, if we get him as a puppy where he will be raised around our girls, meaning it will hopefully be less likely for the net dog to bite?

    I know people will judge us, since we just gave our dog away, but we miss having a bond with a dog!
     
  2. labradrk

    labradrk PetForums VIP

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    Unfortunately what happened is a result of poor management in allowing your child to "hug" a sleeping dog. I am not sure why you thought it was appropriate to allow your children to bother the dog in such circumstances?

    I would probably not get a puppy unless you completely re-think how you manage the dog with your children.
     
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  3. Kari Gascho

    Kari Gascho Guest

    Well that was kind of rude.

    We just got home from vacation, our dog was super tired, our kids were super hyper from not seeing us. He was resting, and before I could move my hand to block her from running up, it was to late. She is 3. She knows better then to hug him while sleeping, but she is 3. So things happen. She also didn't think he was sleeping cause he was on my lap, and normally doesn't sleep on me, but do to us being gone for 7 days, he hadn't slept much when he was at home with the inlaws who were watching our girls
     
  4. SusieRainbow

    SusieRainbow Administrator
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    I would leave it till the children are older, accidents happen and I think you'd be on edge in case it happened again. Why not get a rabbit or guinea pig that you could supervise them with. ?
     
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  5. Kari Gascho

    Kari Gascho Guest

    My husband hates smaller animals ;) We miss that companionship that comes with a dog. The bond. The best friend stuff. A bunny could be fun, but also don't give all the fun stuff like a dog. I don't think we would be to much on edge, cause we know that the dog would be getting brought up around the girls, vs having the girls being adding into it's life.

    And the next dog we do want when the time is right is a Lakeland Terrier Pure Bread. Which will only get to about 15 pounds vs 60 like our last, which would make us a little more comfortable as well. But I can see why waiting would be good too!
     
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  6. Pawscrossed

    Pawscrossed PetForums Senior

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    Sometimes it isn't about what you want. I'd love another dog but my life doesn't mean i can..I'd love a lottery win too. But it's what is right for a dog. I think the suggestion of a small pet that will help your daughter understand good mangement far better.
     
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  7. kittih

    kittih PetForums VIP

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    What would you do differently to ensure a next dog didn't feel the need to bite ? Have you learned where you made the errors with your first dog ? What would you do to ensure the same mistakes were not repeated with a future dog ?

    Why do you think getting another dog will result in a different outcome? I am genuinely interested to know.

    You ask if it safe to have another dog....the answer is it depends just as it did with your original dog.

    If you have:
    -clearly understood where you made errors with your first dog,
    -understood that your failure to manage the interactions between your child and your dog resulted in the dog biting your chid
    -understood that in the scale of aggression biting is the last thing a dog does and that you have completely missed all the other signals the dog was giving to say how uncomfortable he was with the situation he was put into
    - a plan in place to manage interactions between a future dog and your child so the child is not ever allowed or able to disturb the dog when it is resting, eating or wanting to be on its own
    - respect for the future dog that you your selves wont bother it when it is sleeping, eating or otherwise wants to be left alone
    - that you have learnt dog body language and what your dog is trying to tell you and that you protect your dog when it asks to be taken away from a situation it dislikes.

    then, if you have done all these things, then maybe one day you could own another dog and that dog will be safe from being bothered when it wants to be alone and family members will be safe because the dog is not put in a position where it is forced to bite because no one has bothered to listen to it.

    Do I think you are ready to own another dog now ? No. That's because you have shown no understanding in your post how badly you let your dog and child down.

    Learn about the dog scale of aggression, calming signals, dog communication, managing dogs and young children, how to respect your dogs need not to be bothered and then you may be ready.

    Edited to add: if the first and only time you dog bit was when the the dog was surprised from being hugged when it was asleep then it is just an unfortunate accident. I don't quite understand in that case why the dog needed to be rehomed. Any future dog could be as easily surprised and bite if the accident occurred again.
     
    #7 kittih, Jun 7, 2017
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2017
  8. Pawscrossed

    Pawscrossed PetForums Senior

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    It's not just about fun though, it's about boundary setting for your child, learning from your dog and good training. Just because a dog is brought up doesn't mean they automatically know what to do. My late dog was integrated into a family home and we went to huge lengths to involve my stepdaughter in his training at 5 years old and took in lots of info on dog body language. Unless you are able to do that and be accountable (I fear your quick reply to discount that above make me sceptical, but I am happy to be corrected) maybe small things or research and time are a better choice.
     
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  9. Laney_Lemons

    Laney_Lemons PetForums Senior

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    I do think you should wait until your girls are older and have boundaries with animals before considering another dog.

    A puppy soon turns into a dog and will the excuse be my kids are only 7years old and startled the dog which lead to another bite and another rehoming situation ?

    your first post doesn't suggest it was a one off incident, it seems like he was bothered quite a lot when sleeping / resting which you didn't realise or ignored which lead to the bite in the end. I get this is not what you expected to happen but it seems like you pushed him too far and like many dog owners dont realise until the bite happens.

    You mention how 90% of time the dog knew when to walk away ? What do you mean, when he was getting annoyed by the kids?... when the kids bothered him and when asleep or tired he was upset even with you and the husband? .. again why was he being bothered?
    these are clear signals to leave him in peace and you didn't respect his boundary hence the bite in the end as you ignored everything else .


    To answer your question ... no I don't think you should get bother dog/ puppy

    Yes I think it's too soon

    And no because he was brought up with kids does not mean he won't bite especially when puppy turns into a dog and kids have no boundaries
     
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  10. DogsGoneRoaming

    DogsGoneRoaming PetForums Member

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    If you couldn't make the last dog work what makes you think a puppy will work?

    Do you think a new dog will be different and if so why?

    I have a family member who moves from dog to dog when one bites her kids. The dogs honestly aren't the issue it's the lack of supervision and respect for space.

    Your child is young and shouldn't be allowed within reaching distance of a dog if you can't supervise them.

    I don't want to sound harsh but I don't think replacing your dogs the right move.
     
  11. FeelTheBern

    FeelTheBern They don't like it up 'em, sir!

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    I also think you should wait until the children are older before considering getting another dog. If you jump straight in and get a dog right away, another incident could occur. What makes you think another dog will react differently to your children's actions?
    It's not all about what we want and getting it right away. I would love a dog but I know one wouldn't fit in with my current lifestyle. No-one is around during the day which means that the dog wouldn't be getting the attention it requires from its family. It just wouldn't be fair on the dog. Do you see what I mean? If you were to get a dog right now, it wouldn't be fair on the animal. It could easily lash out on your kids if they repeat their actions. You should wait until your kids are older so you can teach them about how to behave around dogs.
     
  12. elmthesofties

    elmthesofties PetForums Senior

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    Just because a dog is raised with children doesn't mean they'll be more tolerant. If anything, I would have thought things would be more likely to go wrong as kids like to pick up and annoy puppies a lot more than with adult dogs, therefore increasing the number of negative experiences the dog would have with children in any given space of time. Someone was posting on here not so long ago that their puppy was starting to growl at her kids when they tried to pick him up, and when they annoyed him when he was sleeping or relaxing. I don't know what happened after that.

    Seconding the idea that small animals can be a really lovely option to explore. Rats can be cuddly tame, and can be easily taught tricks. Small children often find it easier to get involved and it gives them an increased sense of responsibility, and seeing as they're kept in a cage for most of the day, you can make sure that all play sessions are completely supervised. They're not a very long commitment and by the time they've passed on, your girls will have matured quite a bit.
     
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  13. HarlequinCat

    HarlequinCat PetForums VIP

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    To be fair to dog and children I'd wait until the kids can understand that they cannot go up to and wake a sleeping dog. It's a saying for a reason.... let sleeping dogs lie ;);).

    You constantly have to supervise kids around animals. No matter how relaxed and carefree the dog seems.
     
  14. PawsOnMe

    PawsOnMe PetForums VIP

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    You say your dog had to walk away 90% of the time whilst your children bothered him, why didn't you intervene and protect both your dog and your children?

    Wait til your girls are a bit older. (There's a big difference between a 3 year old and a 5 or 6 year olds ability to follow rules). During the few years research your chosen breed, find a good breeder, meet their dogs and then put your name down for a future litter. The time will soon go by (a few years is usually needed anyway to properly prepare for a new dog) and your girls will be old enough to enjoy and be involved in the training of the puppy and be taught how to behave and respect the new dog.

    Don't just think about what you want now. A new dog is a 14+ year commitment, think about it properly so you don't find yourself in the same situation in a year..
     
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  15. cows573

    cows573 PetForums Senior

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    So none of you had dogs as young children?

    Or if so.... none of you hugged them unexpectedly when they were sleeping?

    Or, you were constantly supervised when with your family pet?

    My siblings and I grew up with dogs, were unsupervised with them at times. My kids grew up with dogs and were unsupervised at times. My brother was the only one that got bitten after he repeatedly hit an elderly dog with a sand spade. Neither myself, my sister or my kids were ever bitten or nipped by any of our pets.

    I think the issue here was more with the dog itself, that is obviously much happier in a household without kids, than the children or the owner. Perhaps posters should be asking more about the history of the dog before making judgements? Many rescue centres specifically say that re-homes should go to homes without children for a reason. In my opinion, there is no reason why the original poster should not consider another dog, as long as that dog is a breed that is known to be good with kids, has been properly socialised and raised with children. After all, the children were not abusing the dog when the dog acted aggressively... only tried to give him a hug!

    The poster simply asked for advice and has been repeatedly told.... don't get another dog. Perhaps, it may have been more beneficial to advise them of the best breed of dog for young kids, the best way to manage a dog with young kids in the household, the best way to train young kids with dogs etc... The above posts may just send a newbie off to do whatever they want regardless.

    In my opinion, a carrot is sometimes better than a stick.....
     
  16. DogsGoneRoaming

    DogsGoneRoaming PetForums Member

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    We had a reactive rescue who resource guarded and was territorial of our sofa. We were taught not to go near and if we got snapped at it was our fault. She was happy on her terms and we had a fab relationship but again we were taught to respect her boundaries.
     

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  17. cows573

    cows573 PetForums Senior

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    Exactly! @DogsGoneRoaming! Many dogs require specific boundaries, and as adults, we can respect these boundaries and still have a fabulous pet. However, just because some dogs require this, not all do. And, this should not stop families with young children from having a pet.

    The key is the Right pet with the Right children. If the poster had said that their children had been abusing the family dog and then it reacted... my advice would have been the same as many of the above, but they didn't.

    I have a special needs child that grew up with one of our dogs (one of four then, now three). He was four when we got her as a puppy but was on the level of probably a two year old at that time. They grew up together, played together and learned together. We have a small caravan touring site and reviews refer to our pet as a young 'greyfriars bobby' in relation to my kids! My kids, not that they would, could probably abuse her severely and she would never react aggressively.... would just be emotionally ruined and hurt!

    Our dear Bella, thrives on attention and affection... absolutely adores all our kids and would be lost without them. The Right dog for the Right situation....
     
  18. Zaros

    Zaros Pet Forums, P/resident Evil

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    I'm off to find me barge pole.
     
  19. Vanessa131

    Vanessa131 PetForums VIP

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    You shouldn't be a getting a pet until you wont let your children bother said pet.
     
  20. Jamesgoeswalkies

    Jamesgoeswalkies PetForums VIP

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    But all dogs deserve respect. And just because we have a dog that has tolerance and bite inhibition, doesn't mean that we can allow our children to do what they like with it (because the dog is too polite and well mannered to object). I have such a dog and I am more careful (protective) of her around children (and other dogs that are rough) because she won't object. She is amazing but that doesn't mean she has to lie there and take it. And as adults it is vital that we instil this into our children.

    And this is a case in point as to why children should be supervised until they are old enough to understand that this kind of behaviour is unacceptable. I grew up in a multi dog household as did my children ...and mutual respect was instilled from the start. And if a child isn't old enough to understand then they need to be supervised.

    To the OP - I am in agreement with the majority on this thread in that I would wait before getting another dog ...and please don't get a puppy. Children need teaching how to interact with animals. The fact that your dog was so tolerant for so long (your words "he knew to walk away 90% of the time when the kids bothered him,") suggest he was trying hard to diffuse these situations and I feel for him. The fact that you thought it was acceptable to allow children to bother him, bothers me. Let some growing up happen and maybe try again in a couple of years.

    J
     
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