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Grief is a terrible thing

Discussion in 'Dog Chat' started by Mum2Heidi, May 13, 2010.


  1. Mum2Heidi

    Mum2Heidi PetForums VIP

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    My neighbour had his 17 yr old mongrel PTS 3 weeks ago and he was a man so broken. His wife has been worried sick. He is retired and spent every day with the dog whilst she worked. She thought another dog was the only option altho he wasnt keen. She asked at local rescue centres but their back garden isnt secure.

    She came across a lady who had bro and sis collie x - finding it hard to cope with 2 and thinking of rehoming 1. He came home yesterday and I saw them this morning - it was lovely.

    Altho he is still missing the old boy, the man has already sussed that this one hasn't been treated the way he would and has plans to remedy it. Asked me about food etc. etc. He is really concerned about replacing the old boy and I explained how I felt when I first got Heidi after losing my beloved arab. It takes a while to really let them in but I owe so much to her for getting me thro those dark days.

    It was lovely to see him not looking so sad and the dog looked really settled and happy, very level headed for a 15 month old.
     
  2. rona

    rona Guest

    That's lovely.
    If the dog hadn't been treated quite right, he probably feels as if he is doing something useful as well as getting another dog :thumbup:
    It does take a while to get over :(
     
  3. JSR

    JSR PetForums VIP

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    How lovely that even in his grief he can still allow another needy dog into his heart. I don't think anyone can tell you when it's right to offer your home to another dog. He'll never forget his first dog but knowing he's given the new boy a wonderful home will certainly help him heal.
     
  4. Nellybelly

    Nellybelly PetForums VIP

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    I was just thinking about this, and I read your post.
    I'm so sorry for the man's loss, and NO dog will ever replace his 17 yr old mongrel, but I'm glad he is managing to live with the pain and move on.

    What hurts em the most is not that no dog will ever replace Nelson, in fact this comforts me. I never want to replace him. What hurts me is that he had to go, and even more so that he had to go so soon. He had so much mroe to live for, and he was my all - anything and everything I had ever hoped for when I dreamt of owning a dog. He was my soul mate, my special boy, and my little angel. I always used to call him, "little angel". he still is my little angel, and I still love hima nd still think of him all the time.

    SOrry I went off on a tangent there, and now I need more tissues.
     
  5. Mum2Heidi

    Mum2Heidi PetForums VIP

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    I'ts a real "meant to be" yes, the fact that this dog needs a bit of help is a big asset.

    How lovely that even in his grief he can still allow another needy dog into his heart. - the longer I am here the more I realise how true this is and rather than replacing, we are doing what comes natural and fulfilling a need to give. Losing my horse so tragically crippled me and I wish I had realised this when I got Heidi instead of keeping her at a distance for so long but hey ho, what's done is done and I always loved her just not enough initially:thumbup:
     
  6. rona

    rona Guest

    I was the same when I got Alfie. I felt really guilty that I couldn't love him enough :(
     
  7. Nellybelly

    Nellybelly PetForums VIP

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    I'm not entirely past this stage, I hate to admit. I am much better than I was when I first got Bella....but I don't know if I will ever love any dog as much as I loved Nelson. What I try to do (and succeed 99% of the time) is to love Bella for what she is, and to enjoy the time we spend together.
    All I ever wanted was Nelson. We were made for each other. I have accepetd that and it makes it much easier to love another dog, and I really do adore Bella. But I stil hurt so much for my boy.
     
  8. rona

    rona Guest

    I am the same about my first one. No dog will ever be the same.
    Doesn't stop me loving the others for themselves :)
    Just takes a bit of time
     
  9. Mum2Heidi

    Mum2Heidi PetForums VIP

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    It took me from last May when I got her until Christmas day!

    Our walk overlooks Freddies paddock and I looked across thinking of how we used to hide carrots in his paddock every christmas morning. Instead of tears, amazement at how I would never have dreamt I would be here walking a dog and not there. I looked down and it was then that I really appreicated what I had.
     
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  10. Mum2Heidi

    Mum2Heidi PetForums VIP

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    Just a little update :-

    Saw my neighbour today and he looked like a different man.

    Bumped into them at the nature reserve and it looks as tho they have been together for ages. Hard to believe it has been less than a week. The dog has settled soooo well and is running free with perfect recall aaahhhhh.
     
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