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Feeling a bit sad today

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by Blondie, Jan 5, 2012.


  1. Blondie

    Blondie PetForums VIP

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    For obvious reasons I cant go into much detail, but have realised a resident in the home I am working in was known to me years back in my College days, he was a Lecturer. He now has dementia and has no idea where he is or what he is doing ATM. He was such a nice, sweet, intelligent guy. :(

    Doesnt Dementia just STINK!!!!! :mad:
     
  2. harley bear

    harley bear PetForums VIP

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    Sometimes life deals you such a sh1t hand..its a shame :(
     
  3. Space Chick

    Space Chick PetForums VIP

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    That is sad:(
     
  4. Grace_Lily

    Grace_Lily PetForums VIP

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    It is a cruel illness, isn't it? My cousins Nan has dementia and the way she doesn't recognise her own family is heartbreaking, it's horrible for the person suffering but also the family.
     
  5. DoodlesRule

    DoodlesRule PetForums VIP

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    its very sad. My mum is going that way - was always very active/home maker/stay at home mum but doesn't do much anymore and gets really confused. If she puts a meal in the oven (just her & dad) she does way too much, think gone back in her mind to feeding all 5 of us when we were home. She couldn't work out how to put her trousers on the other day, Dad had to tell her they don't go over your head so seems to be getting worse quickly
     
  6. Blondie

    Blondie PetForums VIP

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    Well, it isnt called 'the living death' for nowt!! :(

    First encountered it 16 years ago when my granda was diagnosed. Its devastating for all loved ones to watch someone slowly die before their very eyes, day on day.

    Mind you, you do get some laughs - we have to laugh sometimes or we'd be in tears all the time. Heres some little 'funnies' -

    Me - where are you going?
    Lady - going home
    Me - you are home sweetheart, you live here now
    Lady - no I dont, I'm leaving home now, I've got a new fella! :rolleyes:


    Lady - what time is it?
    Me - Midnight, time to go back to sleep
    Lady - oh, so I cant get up for breakfast yet?
    Me - no, not yet, I will come and get you up when its time and bring you a nice cup of tea
    Lady - Righto, what time is it?
    Me - its midnight, time to go to sleep
    Lady - so its not time to g3et up yet then?
    Me - No, not yet, go back to sleep
    Lady - oks
    Me - good night
    Lady - what time is it?

    I tell ya - itsl ike Groundhog day sometimes, lol lol!! :rolleyes:

    Bloke - wandering up corridor with clothes on top of PJ's

    Me - what you doing up young man?
    Bloke - I've come to help
    Me - help with what?
    Bloke - with the party for the end of the war........
     
    #6 Blondie, Jan 5, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 5, 2012
  7. harley bear

    harley bear PetForums VIP

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    Id never really put alot of thought into it but after seeing my grandad the way be was before he died and the amazing staff that looked after him i would really like to get into that line of work.
     
  8. Malmum

    Malmum PetForums VIP

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    Yes it's a horrible illness and no one suffers more than their families, they're the ones who have to watch their loved ones deteriorate and lose all of their dignity.

    When I was care manager in a residential home we had a lady come round to discuss dementia and she said in America they call it "sundowning" it's that time of evening when many with dementia get restless, around tea time when they would have come home from work and started preparing dinner for husbands or helping their wives etc. and it's still somewhere in their memory
    that they have to get things done. So very sad! :(
     
  9. Blondie

    Blondie PetForums VIP

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    Aww, very admirable hun. Its fecking hard work for little reward most days. Nursing/Residential homes work staff extremely hard - day shift staff never get to sit down for longer than 5 blooming minutes most shifts, lol! Its back breaking and hard on the feet - comfy shoes are a must ;)

    This is why I prefer to do nights in Homes - its hard too, but on the whole, its not as manic as day shifts.

    Be prepared to work for minimum wage or a few pennies above in Homes too. They are all usually only minimum staffed. One staff for every 7 in nursing homes and one staff for every 10 in others.

    BUT - it can be so rewarding in that you are looking after people in the their twilight months/years. You are the last people they will really see on a day to day basis and sometimes they do things that just put a smile on ya face for days. Most of them just want a little chat - something not easily done when you are working ya butt off all shift, another reason I prefer nights, you can go round them all and have a little goodnight chat. ;)

    The job has given me untold life experience and I wouldnt change it for the world. Its a bit morbid, but I know when owt happens to my mam/nana/MIL/FIL I will be the one to lay the body out - they would all prefer it to be done by someone who knows them, and I dont mind, its a privelege almost, the last thing you can do for someone who has gone on.
     
  10. Sled dog hotel

    Sled dog hotel PetForums VIP

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    Terrible terrible horrible disease, my Nan had it, physically fit and tough as old boots even though she was 94 nearly when she died after a bad stroke. Last few years though, terrible, every day was like groundhog day, that I saw her and however many times I tried to put her mind at rest and explain, they werent stealing her clothes, or her clock was working, or people were nt breaking into her house at night, they were checking on her, (last year or two she went into a residential home when I couldnt do all that was needed anymore)
    every day was the same when I went in to see her.

    What I find really sad too, a lot of the time the ones that are physically great
    end up with dementia, the ones who are bright as a button and mentally wonderful end up trapped in a body that doesnt work. I just hope I can Bail out before either of that happens to me.
     
  11. harley bear

    harley bear PetForums VIP

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    If all goes well me and oh will be starting a business together when we have our finances sorted but i would love to volunteer at the hospice my grandad was in.
    Your right the staff have very little time for patients but they are all just sooooooo amazing! I have a hell of alot of time for every single one of them! No matter how rushed off their feet they are they always find time to make sure your ok..well as ok as you can be:rolleyes:
    I would just like to offer them a little support why they are at work if possible but if things dont go to plan i would like to work as a care assistant full time eventually.
    I have to take my hat off to people who work the demanding hours for so little pay.
     
  12. Sled dog hotel

    Sled dog hotel PetForums VIP

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    And very underpaid and at times very under valued I must say. There are some wonderful carers working and looking after our old people (and occasionally not so good or nice too it has to be said) but the good caring ones are not as rewarded as they should be IMO. Goes for the nurses and doctors too NHS doesnt give the good ones the incentive they should there either.
     
  13. Malmum

    Malmum PetForums VIP

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    It is hard work but in a residential home you know all of your residents and also have lots of laughs with them. An elderly couple used to pack their bags every day and sit in the lobby waiting for the train :) if you asked where they were going it was always Doncaster. They died within two days of each other and were buried together - so beautiful!

    My daughter is an A&E nurse and often has demetia patients to deal with, bless her she is so understanding and loves the old folk. She had a lady in two nights ago who said she didn't want my Rosie anywhere near her, when Rosie asked her why and said she would help her and give her a nice cuppa the lady said: " Don't want you near me, you've got tiny eyes and a great big forehead - like a German" lol :D then she said: "look at yourself, would you trust anyone with a forehead that big?" they are soo insulting yet sooo funny, just love 'em! She made friends with her eventually but the lady was still wary, lol! :)
     
  14. Blondie

    Blondie PetForums VIP

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    Yeah, you have to alugh sometimes! :D

    Problem is with res homes, they might start of a Res care but 9 times out of 10 end up with dementia and all the logistic problems that brings, which increases the workload for the staff on a 1-10 ratio - not good!! :(
     
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