Welcome to PetForums

Join thousands of other pet owners and pet lovers on the UK's most popular and friendly pet community and discussion forum.

Sign Up

Cat sitting - Cat missing!

Discussion in 'Cat Chat' started by Lumboo, Aug 24, 2013.


  1. Lumboo

    Lumboo PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2011
    Messages:
    1,770
    Likes Received:
    96
    We are looking after a friends cat who is a neutered male, about a year old. Our friends were happy to leave their cat for two weeks with a casserole dish full of dry food and another full of water. :confused:

    We said we would go over every day to feed the cat, and they said 'If you like'!! - although they seemed grateful for the offer.

    Anyway, we also told them to keep the cat as an indoor cat when they got him, which initially they did, but then decided to cat proof their garden. The cat escaped the garden as it wasn't cat proofed enough and they said they would get round to fixing it, which they didn't. They left their small window open so he could come and go as he pleased whilst they were away.

    The cat is not vaccinated as they said it was a house cat, but then decided he should be free roaming, despite living next to a really busy road. He is not microchipped either.

    We told them about the dangers of lilies and they didn't get rid of them from their garden, despite me telling them about lily pollen being lethal and causing a painful death.

    Anyway, Duncan has been feeding the cat wet food every day and changing water etc. On Thursday the cat didn't come when called, so he thought it must be in the garden as it was a hot night. He then spent 30 minutes trying to find the cat, but in the end gave up and came home.

    Yesterday he wasn't feeling well so didn't check up, and today we went over together. No sign of the cat and we were there for 20 minutes - Duncan checking the house and me in the back garden.

    Then their neighbour came to see me saying her friend had seen a b/w cat dead on the side of the road. They couldn't find it but were hoping our friends cat was safely inside, which it wasn't. We went searching for the dead cat and found the horrible sight of a decomposed cat. We couldn't be sure it was our friends cat as all we could make out was a black cat with one back white paw.

    I am so upset. I haven't told our friends yet, as we are not sure if it is their cat, but it seems likely. The cat had no collar, but a photo Duncan took of the cat on Wednesday shows their cat with no collar so he must have lost it anyway.

    I am not sure how to tell my friend. Do I tell her now while she is away or wait till she comes back. And even then, should I tell her about the cat being missing or the dead cat we saw.

    Duncan is really cross as he thinks the whole care of the cat was irresponsible and that they treated him as a disposable object. Although I am inclined to agree with him, maybe I should have closed the window and kept him indoors while he was under our care. Duncan said this wouldn't have worked as he was now used to going out, but as he was under a year old (and hadn't learnt recall that successfully) they should never have let him out in the first place.

    Sorry for the long post. I am just really upset the cat seems to have died under our care. We followed their instructions but maybe if I hadn't have done, the little thing would be alive today :(

    Of course it could also be the cat has just wandered off and found a better home, which is what I am hoping....
     
  2. LyraBella

    LyraBella PetForums Senior

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2012
    Messages:
    830
    Likes Received:
    7
    Oh that's so sad. I hope it isn't your friends' cat. :(

    I think if it were me, I'd want to know.
     
  3. Lumboo

    Lumboo PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2011
    Messages:
    1,770
    Likes Received:
    96
    Would you want to know whilst on holiday?
     
  4. catcoonz

    catcoonz PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    14,012
    Likes Received:
    3,863
    How sad and i know how heartbroken and upset you are feeling.

    This isnt your fault, they was happy to just go away and leave the cat but you kindly offered.

    There is a chance this cat isnt theirs, how to play it, well i think i would wait until they come home from holiday and hope the cat returns, if not and it is their cat they only have themselves to blame.
    This accident could have happened at any time, just sad it was whilst you cared enough to look after him.

    Sending hugs to you and paws crossed a hungry cat is waiting for you in the morning.

    RIP Poor Cat xx
     
  5. MCWillow

    MCWillow PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Aug 26, 2011
    Messages:
    12,965
    Likes Received:
    2,675
    No - absolutely not.

    It would make me want to come home, but I couldn't actually do anything once I got home.

    I'd let them know after they are home, and if you feel better telling them a little white lie, like you only found out a day or two before they were due to come home, then so be it.

    So sorry this happened while you were helping out a friend, I can imagine how you feel :(
     
  6. catcoonz

    catcoonz PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2012
    Messages:
    14,012
    Likes Received:
    3,863
    If it was my cat i would want to know straight away even if i was on holiday, but i would expect somebody to know for sure it was my cat first otherwise holiday ruined for the wrong cat.
     
  7. TatiLie

    TatiLie PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Nov 2, 2010
    Messages:
    2,381
    Likes Received:
    40
    I would like to know what happened to my cat whilst on holidays. BUT when I'm on holidays I ASK the cattery at least once a week how my cats are and make specific questions, like if Ari is eating, if she's having soft poo, if Rocco is being mean to her, etc. (which they don't answer most of times and make me more anxious and worried).

    Anyway, my MIL once left her young cat at home when she stayed away for a week for a family wedding. Her nephew was feeding the cat everyday and she (the cat) disappeared after 4 days. I imagine that the cat got really scared when she noticed that she was left alone with little food and water and found a way (which she had never managed before) to escape. We've never saw the cat again. She was uneutered, unchipped, unvaccinated (she was a kitten her other nephew had brought on holidays and left there). And she was a long fur cat which was rare in those parts. Nowadays, when we go there we see as many long furred stray cats as we see short furred ones. A part of me wants to believe that that little cat survived well by herself, enough to populate the area with a new type of cat.
     
  8. maisiecat

    maisiecat PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Jul 28, 2011
    Messages:
    3,377
    Likes Received:
    741
    Would they want to know while they are on holiday?

    Those of us on here would care enough to want to know, but would we be happy to go away and leave our cat with a casserole dish of dry food for 2 weeks?

    The poor cat hasn't exactly been cherished has he? Would they want to know, maybe not, but I would tell them that he has gone missing. Would they bother to come home and search for him? Tell them and see

    I know I would and I expect most of the others on here would but, again, would his owners?

    Or perhaps if he doesn't come back they will think, oh well, lets just get another one :mad:
     
  9. spotty cats

    spotty cats PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Jul 24, 2012
    Messages:
    7,913
    Likes Received:
    4,752
    I thought the same.

    I'd want to know, but suspect I'm a rather different owner than the OP's friend
     
  10. MollyMilo

    MollyMilo PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Feb 16, 2012
    Messages:
    8,588
    Likes Received:
    221
    What a distressing situation, I'm hoping its not your friends cat!

    I would tell them, The most upsetting thing for me about Molly's tragic accident was that I had no idea she had died until I got home from work, 12 hours later. It hurts so much that I was oblivious going about my daily life. Thinking what a crap day ( a human baby lost his fight that morning) and how when I come home my two cheeky meezers would make it alright.
     
  11. Lel

    Lel PetForums Senior

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2012
    Messages:
    672
    Likes Received:
    40
    How sad :(

    I would not tell them while on holiday. As they have not been calling or texting to check on him, and they were going to leave him alone anyway, they don't sound like they would want to know.

    Especially considering you don't know if the cat you found is theirs.

    Also please do not blame yourself. You followed their instructions and tried to keep to his routine. x
     
  12. londongal796

    londongal796 PetForums Senior

    Joined:
    Oct 7, 2011
    Messages:
    846
    Likes Received:
    28
    Just going to say, if the cat found was decomposing significantly then it's unlikely to have been their cat if it was only about 2-3 days of not being seen. I don't think it would be so decomposed you couldn't identify it after that short amount of time. Not trying to provide false hope, only saying based on your description--if it was barely decomposed then it could be. But if it was so decomposed you couldn't recognise it then that sounds like it has been there at least a week if not more.
     
  13. Charity

    Charity Endangered Species

    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2013
    Messages:
    23,853
    Likes Received:
    69,463
    I agree that if the cat's only been missing a couple of days, I wouldn't think it would decompose greatly unless the weather had been very hot. Someone needs to contact the Council to remove the poor dead cat anyway. Did the cat appear to have the same markings as your friend's cat? I think I would leave things as they are for the time being and see if your friend's cat comes back and then tell them when they get home if not, otherwise you could be giving them bad news unnecessarily. You can always say you didn't want to alarm them when you weren't certain it was their's. Its not your responsibility so you mustn't feel bad about it, though I understand you can't help feeling upset. Lets hope puss comes back home and puts everyone's mind at rest.
     
  14. Prowl

    Prowl Guest

    I can only echo what others have said really its very sad this has happened but its not your foult.

    Good idea to wait until they come back. Especially as you don't know the cat is theirs for sure it would be horrible to tell them their cat had died after it escaped only to have it show up a few days later.

    Cat may still hopefully return.
     
  15. Lumboo

    Lumboo PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2011
    Messages:
    1,770
    Likes Received:
    96
    Thanks for all your replies.

    The weather has been both very hot and very wet since Wednesday evening, so possibly it could cause that level of decomposition. I am not sure.

    I text yesterday to ask about their return date and in their reply they asked how the cat was. I am not going to give any bad news by text, as we don't know for certain, but do you think I should at least tell them that the cat has not been home since Thursday, and the food has been untouched?

    Like I said, we will still be going over every day and calling for him (slightly in vain as he doesn't have a great recall sense). Fingers crossed when we go today, he sleepily comes down the stairs to greet us. [fingers crossed with prayers]

    Yes, I will be calling the council today, as whatever the case, someone's cat has been killed on the road and if possible, they should to be told.
     
  16. Prowl

    Prowl Guest


    You could break it to them that he's gone missing as they have asked about him it would be unfair to lie it and if you said nothing it may cause them to worry.

    Just don't mention about the dead cat :>

    Cats can go exploring for days especially in the warm weather. My aunts cat Fred would dissapear for a few days and then turn up again out of the blue.
     
  17. Waterlily

    Waterlily Amused

    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2010
    Messages:
    29,066
    Likes Received:
    1,417
    If it had decayed that fast it cant be the same cat, but how awful. But you shouldnt be feeling bad about telling them, its their irresponsibility that killed it, and its not your burden to carry.
     
  18. Jenny1966

    Jenny1966 PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Feb 7, 2011
    Messages:
    7,211
    Likes Received:
    2,992
    What a horrible situation to be in :(

    I personally wouldn't tell them you found a dead cat that might be theirs, but as they have asked, I would tell them that their cat hasn't been seen for a couple of days. They might well tell you that he often goes missing!

    Fingers crossed he turns up safe and well ((hugs))
     
  19. Lumboo

    Lumboo PetForums VIP

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2011
    Messages:
    1,770
    Likes Received:
    96
    Text to say we have not seen the cat since Wednesday evening, despite calling, but we will be going every day to change water and top up food and will let her know if he comes back. Left out everything else.

    Going over there again now. Will let you know he if has eaten some food from yesterday.

    Been fussing over Oscar and Wilbur even more than usual. Times like this reminds me of why I keep them as indoor cats and spent 1k on cat proofing our garden. I couldn't bear the heartache of losing them like this, or always wondering what happened to them. :(

    Thanks again x
     
  20. Lel

    Lel PetForums Senior

    Joined:
    Mar 21, 2012
    Messages:
    672
    Likes Received:
    40
    I would just tell them that you haven't seen him there at the times you have been to check on him. You don't need to mention food or water. If they are on holiday there is nothing they can do, doubt they will be able to come home early if they wanted to. When are they due back?

    Smelly tinned fish warmed up is good for attracting cats that are nearby.

    Do you think the cat you found is theirs?
     
  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice