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Advice needed.

Discussion in 'Cat Chat' started by Claire1102, Oct 27, 2019.


  1. Claire1102

    Claire1102 PetForums Newbie

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    Hi all,
    Firstly apologies for the long message ...I am after some advice, if anyone may have some we'd be extremely grateful, we have a 4year old cat who in the last year has moved into my neighbours house, not sure he is a fan of the noise of a toddler, in the day and sometimes comes home to ours in the evening. We have made several attempts to get him home but my young daughter is getting upset now so i feel i need to make extra effort. We have spoken to the neighbour who has agreed to stop letting him in, this has been agreed before but obviously she didnt stick to it. We have thought about locking him in for about 3weeks, getting him a proper little cat bed and pamper him to hopefully get him to want to stay back but the feedback I've had from family and friends is this wouldn't work and advice or tips would be greatly received. Thank you
     
  2. Jayne 2019

    Jayne 2019 PetForums Junior

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    Hi welcome to the forum.

    I'm wondering is he's neutered? I'm on the receiving end of this. I started feeding a cat that had been a stray for 7 months, when I took him to the vets to get neutered he was microchipped. They took him back but next day he came back to mine. Someone who works for a cat charity said to get him neutered and keep him locked in their house for 6 week.

    It didn't help but maybe that will work for you, if yours isn't neutered.
     
  3. Jesthar

    Jesthar PetForums VIP

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    Hi Claire,

    Confining him to the house for a few weeks may well be a good idea, but unless you make your home a place he is happy in and wants to stay in you will simply have the same problem when you start letting him back out again. That means thinking like a cat and working out what is stressing him out, and what you can do to make life less stressful so he wants to come home. SImple pampering might make up a part of that, but if he's stressed he won't want the pampering, he'll be too on edge.

    There are better behaviour experts on here than me, but as you mentioned your toddler that's a good place to start. Cats can find toddlers hard to handle, so you will need to provide plenty of places where he can hide away for some peace and quiet. Tall cat trees are a very useful thing here, as he can get up high out of the reach of inqusitive young ones - and cats love being up high anyway, so it's a double bonus. It's also worth investing plenty of time in demonstrating to your toddler how to interact with your cat gently - my best friend currently has twin toddlers, and though their cat is the patient type who likes children and tolerates their natural clumsiness when they stroke her, she won't hang around when they go into grabby mode but heads straight for high ground, or through the nearest baby gate. My brothers cat also uses those tricks now his youngest is up and motoring ;)
     
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  4. Claire1102

    Claire1102 PetForums Newbie

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    Thank you for your reply, yeah he is neutered. Its so hard to do the right thing when not sure what that is
     
  5. Claire1102

    Claire1102 PetForums Newbie

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    Hi,
    Thank you for the tips, we are on day 3of him being locked in, he has been going out at night but has been here in the morning, which im taking as a good sign! I've made him a "safe" place and my daughter knows if his there she must not stroke him, she is gentle with him but she's loud and our house was so quiet before she came along so i think the cat is struggling to adjust. My neighbour has said he was at hers early hrs of this morning but she wouldn't let him in.
     
  6. Orla

    Orla PetForums VIP

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    Please don't let him out at night. Especially at this time of year. Now your neighbour is no longer allowing him to find shelter in her house, where else is he supposed to go to stay warm and dry overnight? You will surely just encourage him to roam further? The idea of keeping him locked in is to completely lock him in, not to keep him in during the day and let him out at night.
     
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  7. Rufus15

    Rufus15 PetForums VIP

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    Some cats just can't cope with little ones. Sadly I've had to rehome 2 of my cats in the last 18 months because they haven't been happy and it's not been fair on them. My children generally don't touch the cats, as part of the household rules, but they are little and boisterous as all children are.

    You definitely need tall vertical spaces, one on one fuss time, and definitely no going out at night
     
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  8. cheekyscrip

    cheekyscrip Pitchfork blaster

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    I thought about a room with a cat flap on a door that the cat can go to when wants a quiet time.

    Plus enough cat shelves high up.

    Cat should be in at night and neighbours should not let it in.


    Some catnip pots at home?

    Maybe remove particularly noisy toys?

    Funny thing is that some cats love tots and allow them what will not allow any adults.

    My own cat runs away from strangers except small children who can pet him if come quietly. He will not move.
     
    Orla likes this.
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