Hi, I'm new to these forums, and wondered if anyone could offer a few words of wisdom. Two weeks ago, I had my little 14 year old tortoiseshell cat, Rosie, put to sleep. As well as grieving for her, I am experiencing overwhelming feelings of guilt. She was blind, had kidney failure, suffered a seizure the day she died, and the vet suspected a tumour, yet despite all of this, he at first suggested she could be treated, raising my hopes. Then when my friend pressed him further, he said there wasn't much hope for her, so I held her in my arms while she slipped away, breaking my heart in two. Did I do the right thing by her, or should I have left it a day or two to see what happened? This is what is torturing me, to the point where my nerves are in shreds. She was left alone for long periods, too, when my dad died, and when I was having treatment for breast cancer. I stayed at my mum's as I have no husband to help me. I think about her all the time, and just cannot get my head around it. If I could get rid of these feelings of guilt, I could grieve for her properly, and remember her with fond memories, instead of 'what if's' Sorry for the long ramble, but I hope there is someone out there who can maybe help. Thank you

First of all, I am dreadfully sorry for your loss. It is always the worst thing when you have to have a beloved pet pts for its own good, and this really was for her own good, wasn't it? She had multiple health problems, was old, probably in pain, and she would only have suffered more if you had left it a few more days. Vets never like to say the animal is better off pts, they like to leave that decision to you, but really what hope was there for a pussy like this? She most probably did not even know what was happening.

You have done right by her, all her life and now with her passing. You cannot feel guilty, though we all do. I lost a beloved dog only a couple of months ago, he was three and passed away from internal bleeding. I keep going over the if onlys, but it doesn't help.

She had a good life, she was loved, unlike all the poor cats in rescue. You can be proud that you did the right thing by her.

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Will always miss you, my little Joshie Woshie xx

If you want real love, buy a dog

If you wouldn't use it on a child, don't use it on a dog

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So sorry for your loss.
What you did for Rosie was out of pure love. Her time had come and if left a day or two the out come would have still been the same, only she would have suffered more.
The feelings of guilt are part of the bereavement that we all go through.
We always try and think if only we had done this or not.
Try and think of the good life of 14 years that she had. Being well cared for and loved and then at the end a peaceful death is all what most cats/ animals and people would want.
Sometimes making plans for the future helps. Maybe next year you might want to take a little rescue in and together you will help each other.
It sounds like you have a lot of love and care to give it would be a shame for it to be wasted.

R.I.P Rosie and have fun at Rainbow Bridge xx

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What Jill3 says is correct.
We all feel guilt when we have to have our loveones pts. There is no hard and fast rule as to when we have to make this final decision and all we can do is look at our pet and think what they are going through. For me it was easy decision to make as my Abbys quality of life was dissapearing and that means everything to me. Yes I felt guilt but she was in no more discomfort. Yes I so miss all my pets equally. What you should try and do is remember all the good times you shared with rosie and take one step at a time, day by day. Believe me your memories will remain and the hurt will go in time.
I am so sorry for your loss
R.I.P Rosie

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Black with white around his private area



Black Tortoiseshell




R.I.P Patch my well behaved boy dog
R.I.P. Abby and Rebel my beautifull litter sister cats

Thank you all so much for your compassionate replies, they really have helped me. I'm sorry for the losses you have suffered, they leave pawprints on your heart,don't they? Take care

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Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened (Anatole France)

So sorry to hear you have lost Rosie. <<< hugs >>>

I understand your feelings of guilt but really you have done the right thing in letting her pass with dignity and love. You should be proud of yourself for letting her go and not keeping her going when there was very little hope for her.

May Rosie rest in peace and have a great time at the Bridge
Take care
xxxx

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HONEY - GOLDEN RETRIEVER X WHITE GSD - 2006 -

Sending love to our beloved ones now playing together over the rainbow bridge.

ZAC - Black GSD - 1978 to 1991
TARA - Black and Tan GSD - 1981 to 1995
AMBER - Pomeranian - 1986 to 2001
BOBBY - Maltese - 1989 to 2007
SHEENA - Maltese - 1990 to 2005
JASON - Maltese - 1990 to 2005
LILLITH - Maltese - 1992 to 2003

I agree with what everyone has said

its horrible loosing a pet extremely terrible, the pain will ease eventually even though you dont think it ever will!

RIP ROSIE XXXXX

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Sugar & Spice (in my avatar) RIP Sugar my beautiful girl!



Cats- Spice (17 years'tabby) Felix (4 years'black&white)Dodger(1 year'black) Splodge (about 2 years'white&black)

Birds- Pepsi- (about 2 years'Cockatiel) Lenny- (11 years'Budgie)

Hamster- Jessie (2 & half' years)

That decision is always horrible. And you always question whether you have done the right thing. Which you absolutely have.

I really believe it is better to make that decision a week too early than a day too late. Something I have learnt the hard way.

RIP sweet Rosie, forever loved and missed.

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2 Lurchers - Bonzo, 6 year old Whippet x Bedlington & Quinn, 3ish year old rescue lurcher
4 Degus - Dave, Jim, Stan & Nige

I so agree with this. When my old mongrel's kidneys failed at the age of 11, he was really ill. His circulation had gone, so he was cold all the time, he would not eat or drink anything, but my 15 year old daughter would not have it. She slept with him all night, fed him water through a syringe, shared her quilt with him. We finally convinced her that he was not going to recover and that she was doing the dog no favours, but he should have gone a week before.

__________________
http://www.gentle-newfoundland-dogs.com
http://www.royston-pet-care.co.uk



Will always miss you, my little Joshie Woshie xx

If you want real love, buy a dog

If you wouldn't use it on a child, don't use it on a dog

http://pettaxisg8.yolasite.com/
http://www.help-for-learner-drivers.yolasite.com/