Smart answer awards


SMART ARSE ANSWER 6th Place

It was mealtime during a flight on a British Airways plane:
'Would you like dinner?' the flight attendant asked the man seated in
the front row.
'What are my choices?' the man asked.
'Yes or no,' she replied.

SMART ARSE ANSWER 5th Place

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets.
As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened
his trench coat and flashed her. Without blinking an eyelid she said,
'Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub.'

SMART ARSE ANSWER 4th Place

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at a branch of Sainsbury's
store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a passing assistant, 'Do these turkeys get any bigger?'
The assistant replied, 'I'm afraid not, they're dead.'

SMART ARSE ANSWER 3rd Place

The policeman got out of his car and the boy racer he stopped for
speeding, rolled down his window.
'I've been waiting for you all day,' the bobby said. The kid replied,
'Yes, well I got here as fast as I could.'
When the policeman finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way
without a ticket.

SMART ARSE ANSWER 2nd Place

A lorry driver was driving along on a country road. A sign came up that
read ' Low Bridge Ahead.'
Before he realized it, the bridge was directly ahead and he got stuck
under it.
Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The
policeman got out of his car and walked to the lorry's cab and said to
the driver, 'Got stuck, eh?' The lorry driver said, 'No, I was
delivering this bridge and ran out of petrol!'

SMART ARSE ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2007

A teacher at a polytechnic college reminded her pupils of tomorrow's
final exam. 'Now listen to me, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not
being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious
personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but
that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!'
A smart-arsed chappie at the back of the room raised his hand and asked,
'What would happen if I came in tomorrow suffering from complete and
utter sexual exhaustion?' The entire class was reduced to laughter and
sniggering.
When silence was restored, the teacher smiled knowingly at the student,
shook her head and sweetly said, 'Well, I suppose you'd have to write
the exam with your other hand'.

__________________
"Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will pee on your computer." --Bruce Graham
There are no rules, rules are only for people who fit inside a box, if you want to think out of the box there is no hope... Life has no Box. (Tony Howells)

Haha! Great post.

#6 is actually my favourite!

__________________

you've got a brill SOH

__________________
You never own a cat unless the cat owns you!

fantastic, they made me laugh

__________________

I love them all lol..... my only problem is.... Now i want to become a flight attendant and get stopped by a policeman just to test them out

hee hee hee,, brilliant,

__________________

brilliant still LMAO,

__________________
My Chat Room http://lynsragdolls.messageforums.net/index.php
www.lynsragdolls.co.uk SPAMMERS Merry Xmas

..........Brilliant!

__________________
Lifes roads are for journeys, not destinations!

hehe,,,brilliant,,,

__________________

Keep Dreaming Smudge! HAHAHA

lol while reading

__________________