I'm in the process of trying to get my 5 month old puppy to let me leave her for longer than a few minutes without having a barking/howling fit. I've read that you are to ignore them for 20 minutes before and after the separation. This doesn't seem to make a difference, but my question is this... if she's been good and not howled the house down, do I still ignore her when I return? I feel like I should be fussing her so she knows she did good, but as I'm supposed to be ignoring her - and distancing myself from her, I'm not sure?

ALSO... I feel like I must be making her very unhappy. Everywhere I've read it says to cool the relationship down, spend less time together etc... so I make her sleep in her bed in the lounge in the day - not on the sofa with me. I don't let her follow me into the kitchen - I close the baby gate. I won't have her on my bed at all and I ignore her as much as I can (that sounds terrible - we do still have fun and play and cuddles). I can't say it's working, but she also just looks so unhappy. I've bought her a pile of toys, and she doesn't bother with any of them, she just wants to be sat with me and I can't let her.

Help!

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Phoebe, our Whippet Kelpie Cross Puppy
Mummy to four cats ~ Angel, Baz, Chester and Whisky

If you leave her and she as been good, dont praise as soon as you get in take your coat of put the kettle on then give her loads of loves i no its hard but you will see a diffrence and have a better dog for it, my dog suffered SA really bad and ate the house it can be sorted if doing the right things and kept on top of it dose not happen over night good luck

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HI. I don't think you should fuss your dogs when you return from being out anyway especially when they are excited and fussing over you. In their eyes it makes you a follower instead of a leader. In the wild the pack leader acknowledges the pack, when he wants to, not when the pack want him to. Incredibly hard I know, when I get home I can't wait to see my dogs, but I have to wait at least 5 mins. It's really difficult as they look at me with such love and excitment!

I do agree that she needs to become more independant of you. Quite honestly, you;re prob more upset at having to do it than she is. She is prob picking up on that and that's why she looks so sad. I agree with the previous advice.

You don't need to reward good behaviour for seperation anxiety, it's not like teaching them to heel where praise/reward is essential. S/A is a behavioural issue because they do not want to be away from you. I have heard that you need to praise or correct behaviour within about 10 or 20 seconds, because after that they won;t remember what it's for.

Build up the time you leave her for. When you return leave it 5 mins and then acknowledge her. But remember she won;t realise why you are praising her, she will just understand eventually that you are going to return and she doesn't need to worry.

It can take time but I'm sure you'll get there. x

Personally, I have always felt it extremely important to have a pack structure, where your puppy or dog comes last You will often find that training is easier once this has been achieved.

I would start by leaving your dog for 5 mins at a time and only gradually increasing. Leaving a radio on is calming and gives your dog the continuity of background noise.

I have never made a big thing of leaving any of our dogs, nor have I fussed them on our return, until they calm down. Only then would I say hello and not in an over the top way.

I am sure with a little patience, your dog will soon be left without any anxiety

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