Hi, I'm new here and would appreciate some help.

I've had cats all my life but only one at a time. After our last rescue cat died we had a break as we had two babies, and we felt we didn't have the time to settle in a new cat. Now all three kids are at school, we decided to rescue a cat.

In fact we ended up with two. The first, Molly, is seven and quite quiet and not that keen on attention. We chose her because she'd been there a long time and had been turned down by several families. We don't know much about her background but I'd say she has come from a home but not one where she had or needed a great deal of affection.

The second, Candy, is young (2) and playful. She has come from a busy home and is easier to handle. She did have a companion but sadly that cat was homed separately. We homed her because we thought she'd be fun for the children to have around, although she had been homed once and that had fallen through.

In accordance with advice from the cat rescue people we cat-proofed a large room for them to stay in with comfy chairs, baskets, two litter trays, food etc. and a nice big window for them to watch birds. At first they seemed happy; but then I was hospitalised with pneumonia and I couldn't give them the attention that I had hoped. My husband has been juggling work and kids and is also ill.

We've now had them two weeks and things aren't going well. Candy is chasing Molly, who swipes and hisses at her. Also Candy is starting to swipe, bite and scratch us, probably because she needs to play, but it's getting to the stage where the children are wary of her.

Molly does seem to be able to hold her own against Candy but we are worried about one of them getting hurt. I am trying to referee their hissy fits but am not well enough to keep following them around the house. We are having to keep them in the cat room at night because I need to sleep; in there they seem to get on okay.

It is going to be at least another fortnight before I am well enough to really spend the time with the cats that they need, playing and supervising etc. We've been told that once they go outside things will settle down but that cannot be for another month yet.

I've tried giving Candy lots of one-to-one time and playing with her but she is still stalking Molly and Molly is swiping at her whenever she goes by.

This is really impacting on my recovery (I know this sounds wet but if you've had pneumonia you will know what I am talking about) and something has got to give. My husband believes we have two choices: try letting themn out now to see if things improve (our old rescue cat used to go out the day after we moved house, which we did frequently, but maybe she knew which side her fish was buttered); or rehome one, probably Candy as she is a bit feisty with people.

I'd be really grateful for any help that anyone can give as I am struggling to see the wood for the trees.

Thank you!

Troublecat.

Oh dear

You could try a Feliway it keeps the peace in our house

Bestpet Pharmacy - -<b>Feliway</b> Diffuser Plug In

Hopefully others will have some more ideas for you x

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All my children have paws!

well I'm sure that someone far more experienced will come along soon but can I ask, did these cats previously have anything to do with each other at the rescue? If not did you keep them separately at all or have they just been left together in a room to get on with it?

2 weeks might seem like a lifetime if you've got so much going on but is no time at all really. I didn't even attempt to play with mine for the first week. They just hid under a chair for days. How long was it before your kids were trying to play with them. Maybe it's a bit scary for Candy. Espec if she's got to deal with new territory, a new cat and a new family to deal with. Mine spent the whole of the first week in their cat room then in week 2 I moved them downstairs as it's easy to clean plus I could talk to them all the time through the door. They gained access to the kitchen in week 3 and now they are having supervised bedroom visits but they still don't access the whole house.

Does she have lots of toys and things she can play with herself that don't require human contact?
Also have you tried a feliway to see if that reduces her stress levels a bit?

I know it's scary. I've only had my two a month tomorrow (seems like years already) and after the first week I was so panicked by them pooing everywhere that I was thinking "what have i done they'll have to go back" but after week 3 we were in a routine and I think they are moderately fond of me now

Have you tried ringing the place where you rescued them from for advice? I was on the phone constantly with my cats foster mum for the first week.


Lastly hope you get better soon.

Hello, thank you both for your replies.

Dally, I'd never heard of Feliway. I will look into it, thank you.

Cloudy, thank you, if I am honest I find getting cats nothing like as scary as arriving home with a real life baby! It's just very tiring right now as I can barely do the minimum of stuff without getting completely out of breath. Thank you for your good wishes, I am really looking forward to getting better as I am so fed up! Luckily our two cats are happy with their litter trays, if they started soiling I think that would tip the balance!

Anyway, I don't think Candy is scared - when we met her at the cat shelter she was up on our laps straight away and played with the children. I think she is bored more than anything else, but she has gone from being very affectionate to being quite stand-offish and very dominant in her behaviour. When she is in the house her tail twitches and she looks very agitated.

Both cats were in the cat room for nearly 2 weeks because I was so ill. They've been out for supervised periods since Thursday or Friday but Candy won't leave Molly alone. We tried letting them out this evening without the kids around but Candy was worse than ever, stalking and ambushing Molly. It's hard for us to tell if this is misplaced play as she could have played with her old companion, but tonight it progressed to one of them growling (not sure which) which is a step up the aggression stakes. Given the choice all Molly wants is a quiet life and ignores Candy until she gets in her face and starts chasing or pouncing on her.

They've come from the RSPCA so they've never been seen in a home environment. Molly had been at our local home for 2 and a half months when we took her in and before that she'd been at a different home in another part of the country that had too many cats - she could have been in what is really an institution for six months before we got her. Candy had only been there for a couple of weeks' but each cat is assessed on site and where possible a history given - how accurate that is who knows - they are never seen at home as far as I know.

We can ring them for help but only at set times and they don't always get back to us the same day.

Right now Molly is out and Candy is in the cat room. Molly is quite happy dozing at my feet. I think if we had either one of them it would be fine, but the two together just don't get on.

Re space, once they are out of the cat room that is it - with the exception of one door our ground floor is open plan with access straight upstairs. They have lots of boltholes, but they don't seem frightened.

Thanks again, both of you, for all your help.

well I think that is def part of the problem if your cats weren't together previously then they aren't guaranteed to get on and Candy is obviously trying to be the dominant cat.

I think it would have been better to introduce them gradually but what is done is done now so I'm not sure what to do next. My first two cats never got on there was hissing and swiping every day at feeding time for 12 years and we pretty much left them to get on with it but when the one died the other one missed him terribly!!

I'm sure someone else with more experience re behavioural issues should be able to give better advice than me.

Hi, Cloudy,

We've only acted on the advice of the RSPCA who had told us to keep them together. They had been socialising them together at the shelter and thought they were getting on really well.

We've just had Candy out on her own and she's a different cat, very loving and affectionate, coming for lots of cuddles. No twitchy tail, just a happy, playful, sleepy cat.

Molly hissed at dh when he went to stroke her.

I'm not entirely sure if Candy is trying to be dominant, I think she wants Molly to play with her and I'm guessing that her old companion used to. Molly just isn't having any of it but I think she likes a quiet life - I'm not sure she's all that fussed about being top cat so long as Candy leaves her alone. But equally I think Candy finds being around Molly stressful, maybe because she doesn't understand what is going on. I think if Molly chose to give Candy a good telling off she'd come out on top.

I don't know if we can keep both cats - although I am happy for them to hiss at each other until they get themselves sorted, Candy isn't getting the message from Molly, and the escalation this evening makes me think they could end up having a serious fight at some point.

Thanks again, you've been really helpful.

I have had a lot of trouble with one of my cats.. I had 3. Beginning of this year sadly I lost two with in a few weeks of each other. Now have new neighbours with I think about 4 or 5 cats. 2 of which have decided my front door is the place to congregate.This has caused my remaining cat , a rescue,to become really stressed. I have two feliways plugged in and was given Zylkene: Because pets get stressed too! to try... It has worked a treat.. I have also found with cats the more you fuss the worse they can get. So try and relax with them and soon I am sure they will too. Two weeks is not very long for them to settle into a new life... Good Luck with them both.

you could try playing with them both together. This might work, takes their mind off each other.
Also each night you could get them together and give them some treats. Hand feeding each one in turn.
We have a ball with the holes in and i fill it with the treats that they like and they love playing with that together. (from pets at home)

In time i think they will settle. 2 weeks is early days and in the animal kingdom there is a pecking order. I think when they have sorted that out hopefully you will be ok.
They might not ever be the best of friends but just tolerate each other.
When i indroduced a kitten last October to a 2 and 16 year old, the 2 year old within one day was smitten with the kitten and still is. Where as the 16 year old as only just begun to wash the little one. Up until last week the poor little one use to get a scowl and a swipe with the poor most days.
Good luck x

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Give it time. At this stage, I would just let them fight it out to establish the hierarchy. It is very rarely that the fights will result in serious injury. The trouble with us humans is that we see cat-to-cat relationships through human eyes. Cats MUST HAVE a dominant cat in their "pride". Unlike humans, the subordinate cat/s don't mind being subordinate. Once the dominant cat issue has been sorted, you will find them settling down. Do not intervene or take sides, it will just add to your stress and theirs. The emerging dominant cat must have your support when he disciplines the other cat, so do not shout at him or make a fuss when he appears to be "bullying". Without human meddling, the subordinate cat will most likely surrender and submit quickly enough. Cats like knowing who is who in the hierarchy.

Hello, everyone, thank you for such kind replies.

I understand the need to have a 'top cat', and I never thought that these two cats would be friends. But the fighting is escalating, and both cats are better in their behaviour towards us when the other isn't around.

Anyway, I had a long chat with the manager at the RSPCA shelter today and the upshot is that we both think that Molly would be happier in a single cat household, or at least one with older cats who won't get in her face too much, and possibly a household where the children are older as well. It will be at least a couple of weeks' before they have room to take Molly back so that gives us time to try some things out to see if things do settle down and we won't be rushing into it.

Thanks again,

Troublecat.