So, here's the situation: (if you don't want to read the essay then skip to the end )

There's a huge (and I mean HUGE) male cat living a few houses down from us and it comes in every night (even multiple times per night) and eats Smudges food. If that's not bad enough, it's gone to the extent of coming in at night and attacking Smudge while she's asleep on her bed downstairs. It did it so many times that she's petrified of being left downstairs at night.

So for quite a few months now she's taken up permanent residence on my bed, which is no problem, apart from the fact that now the male cat follows her scent up to my room and has gone as far as attacking her while she's asleep on my bed!! I frequently wake up to find him sitting beside my bed and staring at her hissing.

It's happened so many times that she's lost all confidence and refuses to even sit down at night if she's not sandwiched between me and the wall. If she hears the central heating come on at night, she'll wake me up by pawing at my legs and sit at the end of the bed staring at the landing for anything up to an hour.

I know quite a few of you might say I'm being too soft with her, or that I shouldn't be allowing her to 'rule my life', but she is genuinely frightened and she's been seriously hurt by him in the past.

She can't hold her own in a fight at all. She's a very small cat in comparison and although she's faster, last time she tried to fight back she ended up with several cat-bite abscesses on her face. One of them was so severe that we almost thought she was going to loose her eye.

Her brother (who she had grown up with and spent every moment of her life with), was run over and killed a couple of years ago. He was her protector and she went everywhere with him, so living a solitary life with cats trying to fight with her the whole time is a huge change for her. We did think about getting her a companion, maybe a younger cat for her to mother, but in her current state I think she'd be more likely to kill it than get along with it!

I suppose what I'm trying to say is that we now have a cat who's a permanent nervous wreck, scent marks everything in the house and claws at the carpets to scent mark with her paws. Just tonight the other cat grabbed hold of her when she was dashing through the catflap and pulled her backwards by the hips. She's a bit more than just 'ruffled', she has scratches down her back and will probably have abscesses by the morning.

So what do I do next? Should I try dunking his whole head in water, spraying lemon juice over him, pinning him to the floor and forcing him to be submissive? Someone's even recommended getting a pellet gun, although I couldn't live with myself if I did that.

The fact is that I know he's someone else's pet and they probably love him dearly, so I don't think that I could ever physically hurt him.

We're definitely getting a microchip cat flap very soon. Has anyone here had success with them in the past? It needs to be very fast at letting her in, as when she's running from a cat at full pelt she's a blur.

Also has anyone had success with the feliway cat spray? I really need to get her confident in her own home again so that she can at least feel safe somewhere in her little world!

Thanks for reading! If anyone has any tips at all I'd be really really grateful!

however the cat is getting in is the solution. stop him getting in the house. upgrade your cat flap to a collar magnet one or lock flap each evening. if hes getting in via a door... shut the door.. seems a lot easier than punishing the attacking cat.

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Im sorry but I dont see why you cant easily fix this problem,stop this cat getting access to your house.If you use a cat flap shut it ,its obvious I would say that if it has no way of getting in then it cant attack your cat.Cats are much safer in after dark anyway and from what you say your female will be much happier safe in her home.I dont advise you to go deliberately harming this cat by putting it in water,pinning it down,spraying with lemon or god forbid using an illegal pellet gun.If from what you say you can manhandle this cat by picking it up and putting it in water then I dont think it is a very aggressive creature.

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change the cat flap asap or make sure it is shut at night so the other cat cant get in

i dont agree with you being cruel 2 it by dunking it in freezing cold water thats horrid

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my pets

Charlie - cat

Jackie - dog

I've tried locking the catflap but he breaks through it, he's literally got through about 3 of our catflaps, they're just not strong enough. That's why we're getting a microchip one soon. There's also no door that I can shut between the kitchen and upstairs to stop him getting upstairs. But thanks anyway

The catflaps we've tried aren't strong enough to keep him out, I've tried locking three different types but he just barges straight through them. I wouldn't have considered using the pellet gun, that's a step I couldn't take against someone else's pet who I'm sure they love to pieces. I was just saying that that's what someone else had suggested. I never said that it wasn't aggressive towards us (or more specifically, my dad who picked it up).

If the cat is breaking through the cat flap,remove it and board up the hole.Your cats safety is more important than easy access to the outdoors.

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hes one determined cat do you not have doors where your cat is so that you ca shut your cat in a shut the bully out

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my pets

Charlie - cat

Jackie - dog

We're getting the microchip catflap soon. In the meantime I've tried locking the catflap and I've tried several strengths of catflap, all of which the other cat has barged straight through and broken.

Dunking it in cold water is kindly compared to what people told me to do to it, I'm not out to deliberately hurt it, but I'd rather the male cat got wet than have my cat loose an eye. It wasn't fully submerged and it's not like I was trying to drown it. Dunking it in water is surely better than physically abusing it by kicking it/ hitting it/ shooting it with a pellet gun, surely? Or at least that's my opinion on it.

I was (and am) concerned for my cats safety, and I've literally tried almost everything to keep him out. Dunking him in water was a last straw. And it was in the summer months, I wouldn't have left him outside soaking wet in the snow or ice or anything. I don't partially like the cat, but I do understand that he's someone else's pet and that they love him like I love my cat.

I suppose I could try shutting my bedroom door, but that might scare her even more as she panics when she's refined to one room. I could give it a try though