my cat has been showing a lot of changes in her behaviour since her brother had to be put to sleep a few months ago. she used to be very timid and skittish, would run away from visitors in the house and wouldnt allow anyone to pet her except myself and my mum.

since she has been on her own she has become much more social and 'talks' a lot, will happily sit with the family and follows us all around the house wanting attention. while some of these new behaviour traits are nice im slightly concerned about how much attention she seems to want, we are a normal busy family and cant often spend hours at a time just sitting petting her and playing with her like she wants.

she also put on a lot of weight i believe this may be because spike had quite a dominant personality and she wouldnt eat until he had finished so now he's gone she eats more. we are monitering her food amounts and have put her on diet cat biscuit mix as recomended by the vet; but i think the other reason is that she has become very afraid of going outside and will not leave the house except to go to the toilet and even then she will stay as close to the house as possible. this morning my mum had to go out with her and stand nearby before she would leave the safety of the house to go.

the number of other cats that come into our garden has increased dramatically since spike died and she seems very frightened of them.
even when they're not around she will only sit at the door and look out over the garden instead of going outside. i know there's one tom that might be spraying which is probably freaking her out even though hes really old and arthritic so shouldnt be a big threat but that as well as the younger cats is just too much for her. im mainly just really worried that as she was previously mainly an outdoors cat being so sedentary could have a serious effect on her health.

the vet said her new behaviours arent unusual for a cat who has previously had a companion and then lost them and suggested perhaps getting a new kitten may calm her, however because of her previous behaviour traits im not sure if she could cope with the stress as she is six years old and has only just gained a reasonably calm temperment and my mum is worried that in particular a male kitten would just boss her around like spike used to and she would regress.

if anyone has experienced something similar, has any advice or suggestions for anything i could do to help her please let me know, it would be much appreciated!

This is really sad. It sounds to me like she has lost her friend and her protection and her change in temperament shows that she is looking for somebody else to look after her now.

I don't have any experience with this but I am sure other people will come along and give you some help.

I would think again about getting a new playmate. If your bought a kitten it might just bring your current cat out of her shell enough to then become the dominant one.

One of my old cats was a resue cat with his mum and had both been treated very cruelly in the past. Sadly the mum died, she got blood poisening from very bad teeth, they were very unfriendly cats due to their treatment but they did love eachother. When she died, her sone went on to actually come and sit with you, not let you pick him up, nor close both doors to a room, but gradually he got a little bit more loving, missing his mum.
I truly believe animals miss friends and relatives, they miss and remember owners so why not their animal buddies.
I agree with the last reply about a new buddy!

thanks for your input its been really helpful
i think we are going to look into getting a kitten so she has a friend
which will be great because there'll be a baby in the house again!
she definitely seems to miss having someone to play with so hopefully this will cheer her up.