I don't think people mean to harm their cats by leaving them to roam freely. However I think it's such an ingrained idea that cats can never be trained or be happy indoors, that it's difficult to discuss this matter. One of the people I know who lost two of her cats is unwilling to get another cat because she does not want to go through the whole misery of losing pets again. She is adamant that cats need to go out and explore.

Cats are hunters and they do diminish the bird population. Someone in a shop told me they don't like cats because they kill "everything". Well they don't kill everything but I realised that this person seemed certain that all cats are horrible killers. This leads to people disliking and then maybe harming cats?

It's not cheap to have pets, and that is exactly why it's odd to me that the pet is allowed to roam free. Nothing that is "free" can also be owned(like the way we own a dog or an object) I think. If I had outdoor cats being fed by someone else I would probably talk to them and we could actually work out a rota for the feeds; someone do morning and the other evening. It does not need to become so nasty and tense because I think it's wonderful if your pet is being looked after by not just yourself but by others.

I prefer cats being indoor cats, especially with this weather. I also don't want them contracting diseases or getting into fights.

To be honest I didn’t even know that there were ‘indoor’ cats so to speak or at the very least I didn’t think they were commonplace.

All the cats I’ve had have been indoor/outdoor cats. I think it’d be a bit weird for them to be cooped up indoors all the time, aren’t cats supposed to roam around and wotnot. Although if you live in high rise apartment I guess it’s not practical. But if I lived in a high-rise or anywhere else not suitable for a cat I just wouldn’t get a cat. Maybe some cats like being indoors.

Back to my OP. The cat hasn’t been around for the last few days. I often see the owner so when I next see her I’ll have a chat. I can’t say I feel any guilt nor should I.

I wasn’t trying to ‘steal’ the cat. I was saving him from being in the cold and rain with no shelter.

The last two cats my parents have had, including the current one have been ‘adoptees’. They both lived on our street and found they got a better deal my parents house. Both the owners were fine about it, in fact the current cats old owner was quite pleased because he was aware that he was spending a lot of time away and was planning on living abroad during winter time. Both of them still visited the old owners and other houses in the street.

I have the same thing ,cat comes in my house as the owners are out 14 hours a day and leave the cat out. They dont mind him coming into me for food, but unfortunately the cat now regards my house as home.The owner knocked on my door sunday and said have you seen my cat yes i said hes in my garden and gave it to him. I didnt want an argument but i would like to have said what do you expect if you leave him for all those hours he will find a new home.

I have the situation where someone else is feeding my much loved ginger cat and allowing him to stay in their home. Yesterday, I had not seen him for 2 days and was very concerned but knew he went to the house so after walking the local roads calling, I went to the house. The woman there had also encouraged my other cat in a couple of years ago, but my son had spoken to her about that. (She denied knowing anything about this.) She appeared to find it amusing and said that he had been there half an hour earlier, that he came and went. I asked her not to encourage him by feeding him. She said she had to have her doors open and that she couldn't stop him from coming in. She had had a cat that died but now has a ginger cat of her own. I asked her again not to encourage him, she asked what was she to do to discourage him, kick him? I told her not to be ridiculous and to just stop feeding him and put him out if he wanders in. She told me to go away and worry about something else! ! ! and shut the door! At which point I rang the bell at quick 15 sec intervals until she opened it again. She just kept on telling me to go away - talking over me all the time - I was calmly trying to ask her how she would feel if it was her cat that went missing for 2 days and she found that someone else was feeding it and making him at home in their house. She told me to leave her alone, that her husband had had a stroke! (What this had to do with it I don't know) Obviously just not able to admit that she was in the wrong and was trying on the 'I'm so hard done by act'. I have to admit I did say "oh and you think you are the only one who has problems, what has that got to do with this?" And again she shut the door and I left, absolutely livid. The woman was wearing a smug grin and just would not listen. Such a futile conversation and she was absolutely unbending in her view. Even had the cheek to say he was always starving and was outside her house catching pigeons - well, not only is he fed but he is also a cat and very much a ginger cat at that, catchable creatures beware!

Feel a bit better now I written it out and he also came home late last night, was it by chance or did she shut him out, who knows? But I'm still livid and don't want to let him out anymore. I tried to find the thread which is mentioned in the attached post, but couldn't. I have searched the internet but have not come up with any posts about real advice. I would seriously serve a legal document on this woman if I needed to and could. It's either that or give her a slap but I'm not a naturally violent person. But seriously, how dare she?!! Any comments please?

I would write a letter to the woman formally asking her not to feed your cat as he has a medical condition. Get a tag for his collar such as this diabetes one ( my cat HAS got diabetes so wears one )
Cat Tags
In the letter tell her in no uncertain terms that if she continues to feed the cat, knowing that he has a medical condition, you will report her to the RSPCA who WILL deem this to be animal cruelty. Oh, and you will sue her for the vet fees.
She might not look so smug then.

If Charlee isn't eating her food, I'm concerned. I assume she's either sick or someone else is feeding her when she wanders around.

Whilst it's kind of you to give this cat some attention, it's best not to feed him/her as it's not fair to the owner.

A few months back we had a cat wander into our kitchen, one we had never seen before but which was owned as he wore a collar and tag and was evidently well loved (Desmond he was called) we called the number on his tag and the owner informed us he was at work and the cat did have a habit of getting out, apolgised for any inconvence and asked us if we could look after him for a couple hours until he got home from work. We gave him a little food and some water just to keep him going and after he was picked up we haven't seen him again.

The moral of the story, cats pick their own homes we can't make that choice for them so even if you don't feed and water them, if they have decided they like your home and can get food somewhere else then the cat has adopted himself a comfortable place to sleep as well as a place for regular meals.

Wow. Seems like so long since I posted this thread!

So what happened? Well….. I tried to encourage the cat not stay at my flat. Basically I just didn’t let him in which was heartbreaking but I knew I needed break the habit. A couple of times I did let him in because the weather was really bad and he was meowing at the door but I didn’t feed him.

Then one night when I’d let him in and it was getting late I knocked on his owners door. The owner was out but her boyfriend answered the door. I explained the situation and said that I loved cats and I loved having him around but I was getting worried because he was spending so much time in my flat and I didn’t want him to get too attached. I said that perhaps they should get a catflap. He said the flat was rented and they didn’t want to upset the landlord – reading between the lines I think they probably had a ban on pets as part of their tenancy agreement or hadn’t asked the landlord for permission and they didn’t want to get rumbled. He didn’t seem that bothered, he said that he was a very social cat and spent a lot of time in other peoples houses around the neighbourhood. This reassured me somewhat but I asked if he wanted to come over and pick him up. So he came over to my flat and on the way he introduced himself to me and told me the cats name was Stanley. Anyway as soon as Stanley saw his owner in my flat you could see the look of astonishment and guilt on little Stanley’s face. It was so funny! So off they went together and I was left feeling a lot less guilty and a lot more reassured.

I continued to let him in occasionally but I never fed him and soon after that I moved out the flat. On a couple of occasions I saw neighbours call him by name so obviously he was a very social cat and spent a lot of time in other peoples houses.