hi There, I am new to this forum as I have become a bit concerned about the behavior of my cats and would like some advise.
I got a brother and sister from cat rescue 3 months ago- they are now 8 months old. They were both very timid when I got them. The boy - jack- is now very pushy and always craves attention. As a result the girl- Meg- appears to have her nose pushed out and has started to become very withdrawn. I try to single her out as often as poss to give her attention but jack always muscles in. If I separate them they cry. I don't know what to do. Meg always seems so sad and isn't playing as much anymore.
Please help.
Thanks Jo

I take it they spayed/neutered?

yeh they are.

Any personality change in an animal I would get checked out by a vet - there may not be an obvious physical problem but for peace of mind I would rule this out first.

How are they together? Does he bully her? Do they fight? How do they interact together?

I have to constantly be aware of who gets affection from me & my OH as we have 2 dogs & 2 cats, some nights all of them want to be centre of attention!

Have you tried playing any games where they can both play together so you are interacting with both? What about when they are fed - can you feed Jack then spend some time with Meg & vice versa?

Hi,
They do play fight though it is getting more aggressive as they are getting older. But they also curl up and sleep together. Occasionally Jack will groom Meg. When I try to play with them both Jack is very boisterous and Meg just sits aside and watches. I try my hardest to involve her. She is still very timid- doesn't like loud noises, sudden movements.
They are both at the vest every 4 weeks at the moment for heath/weight checks to ensure they are having correct amount of food etc.
They both seem to be constantly hungry but I weigh their food as per recommendation. There is no way I can feed them separately. jack would just muscle in and eat Megs food. Food always comes before play- I have tried that one!I have to feed them in separate parts of the room. They are just about getting used to which dish is theirs.
I have started to put jack in the hallway whilst giving a bit of attention to Meg and play with her but he cries like mad and I feel so mean. I think this also upsets Meg.
Thanks for talking this through with me. I realise now is an important time in their lives when habits are being formed and I want to straighten this out asap.

What are you feeding them? If they are showing signs of being hungry then they may need more food or one with a higher meat content (if you aren't already doing this)

What's their weight like? One of my cats is quite a chubby boy but was always hungry, we gradually changed his food to none of a higher meat content & this did help (do this gradually if you do intend to change).

He will always be a greedy boy & we have to sepaerate him & Winnie at meal times then supervise her. She eats so slowly & given half a chance will try & steal her dinner - honestly I can't even turn my back or he ambushes her.

Don't feel too mean about him whining. It really won't so him any harm. My dogs are like that at the moment when I'm doing short training sessions with one the other howls as if they're being so neglected

It's good that you want to to try & sort this out now, they are both very young & will have loads of energy at this age so don't feel you are being mean to one whilst you are playing the other.

It seems like you have your hands full with your cats too.

It must be a girl thing as Meg eats really slowly- she is more of a grazer than a gannet. I give them 3 meals a day. Morning afternoon and bedtime. I have tried two a day but Meg will leave half of hers for later and then Jack eats it!

I feed them Purina One dry food most of the time but I do break it occasionally with whiskers wet food. I have tried other dry foods and they only like this one. What do you feed yours?

you are right about then having loads of energy and they seem to use it after I have gone to bed. Honestly its like they are wearing clogs running around the lounge on the laminate floor!.

Hello,

You could almost be talking about my two cats, I was thinking of posting something similar soon. I have two 9 month old boys that I got from a rescue centre 2 months ago. One of them Oskar has come round and is very affectionate, sits on my lap and doesn't mind being picked up, the other one Max however still isn't even sure about being stroked, runs away if I walk towards him and even gives me the odd hiss sometimes. Yesterday when my boyfriend tried to stroke him he jumped up and tried to scratch him- and I thought he was improving!

I think it might have to do with them being stray originally and perhaps Max was the one who looked out for his brother when they were on their own. Also I think he gets jealous seeing me with Oskar, the other day when he was on my knee he sat on the chair next to us and glared at us in a kind of outraged way, if he could have had hands on hips I think he would have done!

So I don't know if maybe your Meg is also confused seeing you getting on well with the brother.

I've been using Feliway diffuser and spray and I think it has improved things a bit, in fact yesterday the diffuser had come unplugged so maybe that's why Max went back to being a bit wild. I've been spraying it on my sleeves as well and he seems to be more relaxed being stroked when I've done that. And have you tried catnip on the toys to get her interested? Max seems much more susceptible to that than Oskar, strangely.

Also when they've been hiding away and not eating enough I've hand fed them bits of chicken, or given them two separate little bowls of tuna, they don't seem able to resist that.

I've spoken to people who've had rescue cats and it's taken 6 months or even a year to get them properly settled in so I suppose they're bound to act a bit strangely after such a short time.

I just hope Max is better by the time I need to take him to the vet, at the moment I don't know how I'd get him into the cat box!

LOL, I'm off work sick at the moment & all I can hear is both of them charging around upstairs - its sounds like I've got horses up there!

Winnie takes forever to eat her meals, she stops for a cuddle every couple of mouthfuls which is very sweet but can be annoying when I'm trying to get everyone sorted before going to work.

We've always had to supervise meal times as Basil will just steal hers given half a chance. He's even tries it on with the dogs occassionally if he's feeling bold.

I usually feed them either Natures Menu, Bozita or Natures Menu. I also try to give them a raw chicken wing or something similar each week which keeps them busy (I do watch Basil to make sure he doesn't try & swallow it whole!).

There's a really good sticky from Hobbs2004 which lists most brands & their ingredients which i found really useful A-Z of wet food for cats

Hi Lucyh,
Its good to know that mine aren't alone. Jack was the most timid when I got them and now it is vise versa. So does sound very similar.
Thanks for the sticky on cat foods Cleo38 it is useful and will have a good read when I have a bit more time. hope you get better soon.